The Daughters Weigh In

 

The Doods weigh in
The Doods weigh in

The Doods We’d like to say kudos, bravo and woof to our self appointed pack leader on her last post. In our humble opinion (well, Charley is humble) it was insightful and accurate. We’ve talked among ourselves and think her daughters may be a little jealous of us. 

Now that the Doods have weighed in, here’s the good news and the bad news. All three of my daughters read my last post about dogs being better than children. Here’s the really bad news. Mother of the year is definitely off the table. Danielle (yes, I’m naming names) fell back on the old saying, “if you can’t say anything nice.” I’m going to cut her some slack because she has a two year old and a four month old. I’m sure if she wasn’t sleep deprived she’d have had some wonderful things to say.

On facebook she asked (or begged) for her sister Nicole to chime in. Nicole suggested they write their own blog called, “Our crazy blonde mom who looks like her dogs.” They shot that one down because they were afraid I’d like it. They were correct.

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Me, Nicole and the Doods

Since Nicole is the one who actually likes the dogs, I asked if she’d mind sharing the post, meaning with friends. Instead she shared it with Jennifer, the oldest, and the one who pretends that she hates the dogs. Jennifer’s response was, “Lets see the dogs take care of her in her old age.” She did have a point.

Jennifer really surprised me one day when she told me that her friends had been looking at the blog and cracking up. I was so flattered, assuming they’d been reading it. She said, “no mom, they couldn’t understand about the movie with Charley and the whole thing about you and the dogs looking alike, so I just showed them the pictures. They were laughing so hard they were crying.”

Okay, there is a similarity
Okay, there is a similarity

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GUS Yes, I’m in a shopping cart. Don’t ask. Elbee told me that to be funny, Danielle sent Pack Leader a video of a man dancing with his dog and asked if any of us could do that. Now she wants to take lessons with me. Oh no!

Top 12 Reasons Dogs Are Better Than Children

First I’d like to apologize to my three wonderful daughters in the hopes that this post won’t put me out of the running for mother of the year.

Here are my top twelve (trust me there are more) reasons that dogs are better than children:

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  1. When you’re housebreaking/potty training a dog you can reprimand it for having an accident without his shrink hearing about it years later.
  2. Dogs go through the “terrible two’s” in the first few months of life and generally don’t throw tantrums in the middle of department stores. (You know which daughter you are).
  3. You can leave a dog at home alone in a crate without someone calling child protective services.
  4. Same goes for leaving them in the car as long as it’s not hot out and the windows are open.     get-attachment-3.aspx
  5. You can walk a dog on a leash without someone questioning your parenting skills.
  6. You can educate your dog in a class at the park instead of at Harvard.
  7. They eat out of one dish.
  8. They don’t date.
  9. They don’t drive and crash your car.
  10. They don’t judge.
  11. They love you unconditionally and don’t question your wardrobe choices.
  12. They don’t borrow your clothes.

GUS  My big brothers said that she finally got it right and told me to give her a high five for all of us. I feel pretty special even though I’m still a little confused.

 

OMG I Have O.D.D.

 

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Recently a friend, oh who am I kidding about 10 friends and a few strangers, e-mailed, face booked and instagrammed me about O.D.D., obsessive dog disorder. Am I really that obvious?

As you can see from the illustration, it said to share. So why not over share with all of my fabulous fellow dog lovers

I’ve always suspected that I have undiagnosed A.D.D. or as they called it when I was a kid, “can’t you ever sit still and pay attention?” It got so bad in high school after my father died that someone (I’m not naming names) nicknamed me Flea! But O.D.D. was something new. The dogaholism that I confessed to in my first post was a real thing.

While I was reading the symptoms all I could think was, “if the shoe that the dog hasn’t chewed fits, then wear it.” I couldn’t even be offended. I was kind of the role model for O.D.D. I was also kind of proud.

Let’s consider. I definitely have more than one dog and run in to greet them before anyone else. (Apologies to my grandkids). I would step over the dogs before I would make them get up and be uncomfortable. As for dog toys, I tripped over two of them and a dog when I was getting up to go to the bathroom the other night.

ELBEE She tripped over me the other night and I’m hard to miss. It wasn’t the first time either. I probably shouldn’t have laughed but she didn’t get hurt.  All I could think of was that expression I’ve heard the kids use, “Have a nice trip. See you in the fall.”

Back to my O.D.D. I’ve also admitted that an ulterior motive in having therapy dogs is that it gives me an excuse to spend way more time with them and actually get credit for it.

As for the way they eat, I won’t even discuss the number of places we go for their food, vitamins and supplements. I do feel guilty that I don’t cook for them. I have a few friends that do, but they’re way more Martha Stewart than I could ever hope to be. I’m a little envious.

What they didn’t mention on the list is that we spend more time and money on grooming and pampering our dogs than we do on ourselves. I have huge baskets filled with their combs, brushes and sprays. Mine fit in one cupboard. They go to the “salon” way more often than I do too. Maybe I need to rethink this.

We O.D.D. people also  find conversations about our dogs to be endlessly fascinating. If we run into each other out walking our packs,  it’s over. We spend so much time talking about our dogs and sharing cute photos,  we should just meet at Starbucks instead of pretending that we’re exercising.

For the record, I would like to close by saying that I’m out and proud with my O.D.D.

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CHARLEY Excuse me, why are people making fun of O.D.D.? I think it’s very noble and appropriate behavior. I myself suffer from a bit of O.P.D. (Obsessive People Disorder). I just don’t like to be alone and I have a question. Why is it okay for PL (as we refer to our fearless, self-appointed pack leader) to be obsessed with us but when I follow her around I’m considered a stalker. I think I’m going to tweet about it.