Take a Hike

In high school I was voted least likely to ever go hiking. At first I was a little offended because I thought it might have to do with my glasses, braces and orthopedic shoes, but as I gave it some thought I was really quite flattered. Although I’d never met a female hiker (I don’t think we had any in Syracuse) I had a vision in mind. They were overgrown Girl Scouts who wore ugly shoes, uglier shorts, carried backpacks and had some sort of Swiss army knives hanging from their belts.

Several years later, with this picture in mind, when a couple of acquaintances at the gym asked me if I’d like to go hiking, I blurted out, “you must be joking!” Then I realized they were both wearing make up and cute outfits and shaved their legs, so I thought why not?

To make a long story short, after one hike, I was hooked. I was a born again nature lover. To this day, there is nothing that has helped me more physically, mentally or spiritually than going into the mountains. It’s like church or temple without the guilt and sermons. Plus you build up your legs and your stamina and can bring your dogs.

When I first started hiking, I  went with friends but as the years went by I  wanted to take off without waiting for someone else. That’s when I got the brilliant idea to take the dogs. They followed me around like stalkers so why not put the attachment to good use. I didn’t know how much help they’d be in an emergency or if they’d even recognize an emergency, but they gave me a sense of security.

 CHARLEY I’m a little offended. Of course I’d recognize an emergency. What Pack Leader neglected to share is that the first time she saw a snake she ran screaming down the trail, and you know she’s not a runner.

GUS There are snakes in the mountains? I’m terrified of snakes. No one ever tells me anything.

You may be shocked to hear that my daughters, remember them, the ones who are suing me and who, somewhere along the line, had become my mothers, were not thrilled with this arrangement. The way they put it was, “You’re that crazy person wandering around the mountains with her dogs.” And I thought I was a cute Grizzly Adams.

ELBEE I have one thing to say. If PL takes one more picture of me with flowers in my hair, I will refuse to ever go hiking again. She’s ruining my street cred.