November 2021 – Me and the Doods.com

I Can Still Bench Press the Dogs & Other Things I’m Grateful For

In this uncertain world where watching the news can give you stomach pains, I thought it would be a good idea to focus on the positive.

ELBEE That is way too much information.

First, thank you to my husband Doug, my daughters, sons-in-law and grandchildren. My life would have so many empty spaces without you. A shout out to Jennifer for doing Thanksgiving. I am grateful that we could be together and that all I had to bring were my fabulous stuffing and sweet potatoes.

ELBEE Seriously?

Thank you to Doug for his steady support during the pandemic and for coming to terms with the fact that Henry is getting larger by the day

I truly appreciate the friends in my life. COVID-19 made it difficult for us to see each other but I always knew you were there. When you shared that my writing was bringing you joy, you brought me joy.

I am also grateful for the memories of family and friends who are gone but whose loving presence guides me. I will always hear the laughter of my brother Stan and my dear friend Eileen.

The mountains are still my spiritual space, my sanctuary. Standing on an overlook with the ocean in the distance gives me peace. Thank you to my mountain friends. We may not know each others’ names but I treasure our camaraderie.

I want to acknowledge the older couple who have made it their mission to clean up trash on the trails. I frequently see them coming down with bags full which is inspiring but sad at the same time.

Thank you to the bike riders who have finally gotten bells and actually say “thank you” when you move over to let them pass instead of trying to run you down.

ELBEE She can’t get past her issues with the bikers and that last statement is a bit sarcastic for a gratitude list.

I am deeply grateful that I have been able resume in-person visits with Gus and Stanley. A year and a half of Zoom calls was better than nothing but seeing them interact with patients, family and staff is heartwarming. I have been so touched by the incredible welcome back that we have received at UCLA and at Tarzana Hospital.

I feel so fortunate to be able to continue on this therapy dog journey that began fifteen years ago with Charley and then Elbee. The Doods have taught me about kindness, healing and unconditional love. They have filled me with gratitude.

ELBEE Finally it’s about us.

And I can still bench press them!

HENRY I didn’t sign up for this.

ELBEE I feel your pain.

Henry, Bigger by the Day

Gus did something very strange. I woke up early and saw him sleeping soundly in his favorite spot by the fireplace. Suddenly, he sat up, flew across the room and jumped into my arms. He buried his head in my neck and cuddled up as if he couldn’t get close enough.

I’ve seen the dogs “running” in their sleep. I’ve heard them bark lightly through their snores. Elbee even howled in his sleep after Charley died. What Gus did was a first for me.

ELBEE I think it’s fairly obvious. Gus saw the trailer for Clifford the Big Red Dog and was having a nightmare about Henry getting to be that size.

Speaking of Henry, he’s going through a puppy phase. One minute he’s calm and adorable. The next he’s all over the place. I think it’s more obvious because he’s so large.

Saturday morning he had his first obedience class. Let’s just say he was more interested in the other dogs and the activity in the park than he was in the training. I’d give him a C+ in leash walking. On the bright side, Michelle, who also trained Stanley at that age, commented to her assistant, “Ellen’s dogs start out goofy but they’re great later on.”

ELBEE I don’t think that’s a compliment.

I’ve started hiking with him too which is going better than class. He sort of stays by my side when he isn’t completely distracted by the sights and the smells. He greets the mountain regulars with tail wagging. Even better, unlike Stanley, and especially Gus, his hair isn’t like Velcro so he doesn’t bring home every twig and burr.

GUS What’s Velcro?

I also took him on his first official shopping trip to one of my favorite little neighborhood clothing stores. The women are dog lovers who have always welcomed the Doods.

Sabrina, who was working that day, fell in love with Henry and the feeling was mutual. In between his puppy antics and talking to the dog in the mirror, he flashed her a smile and rolled over for a belly rub. When we were leaving she said, “He’s such a cool dude.” That’s exactly what my husband calls him. Maybe there’s hope.

ELBEE Let us pray.

Lead with Kindness

The Doods are truly back in action. After the stress and uncertainly of the past year and a half, it’s so gratifying to see them doing what they do best.

On Wednesday, Stanley and I visited our regular neuropsych units at UCLA. The teens, who can be tough to reach, were amazing. One of the boys, who’s very familiar with the props and pictures I’ve been using since Zoom, offered to help. He asked the other kids to name the dogs’ favorite game and even held up this photo.

When we were leaving the floor, two of the therapists, whom I’ve known for years, really wanted me to understand how deeply moved they were to have the dogs back. With tears in their eyes above their masks, they shared that some of the positive behavior that I see so routinely, only happens when the dogs are there.

For the first time in over a year and a half, I took Gus into Tarzana Hospital. Although we did see a patient or two, we were there for the staff. From the security guards to the administration to the medical personnel, we were surrounded by happiness.

As we moved from one nurses’ station to another, with Gus cuddling and performing, I heard the phrase that has become so familiar. “Thank goodness you’re back.”

ELBEE We’ll let her think they were talking about her.

On Saturday, Stanley and his PAC buddy Herman worked a job fair at UCLA, something that would have been impossible only a few months ago. It reminded me of how much joy they can bring to any event.

People came by to chat, to take photos (several selfies), to share their own dog stories. The job market is a serious issue, but the event was festive and Stanley and Herman made it even more fun.

ELBEE I saw Stanley handing out his resumé.

Driving past an elementary school in my neighborhood this morning, I noticed this marquis:

**Character Trait of the month: KINDNESS**

It made me think how the dogs bring out the best in people by leading from a place of kindness. Now, in these still difficult times, we truly need to do the same.

A simple encounter at the market brought that home even more. I was pushing my cart out the door when a man who was entering moved over to give me room to pass. I said “thank you.” He looked at me, smiled and said “thank you!”

Here a Henry, There a Henry…

With COVID and the current outbreaks of leptospirosis and canine influenza, I’ve been very cautious about taking Henry out. Now that we’re vaccinated, I’m making up for lost time.

I’ve started taking him all over the neighborhood. It’s funny how some people will look at us strangely, as if something’s off.

ELBEE Could it be her 80’s hair?

Some don’t seem to recognize me without Gus and Stanley.. Others will kind of hesitate before asking, “Where are they?”

Socializing with a large, sometimes goofy, puppy can be very interesting, especially if that puppy likes to stop and stare at people.

HENRY Is she talking about me?

ELBEE Yes. Get used to it.

Thanks to Henry, I met some very nice neighbors around the corner. In the past we’ve just smiled and waved but the other morning Henry stopped in his tracks to watch them unloading groceries from their car. When it became obvious that he wasn’t going to move until they paid attention to him, they started laughing and walked over.

As I introduced him, they immediately said, “That’s our grandson’s name.” That led to talk about families and then, of course, the conversation turned to dogs. They had lost theirs several months ago and were thinking it was almost time for a new one. Meeting Henry gave them a little more incentive.

And what’s the chance that the next day I’d meet someone else with a grandson named Henry? Up until now the only Henry in my life was one of my oldest and dearest friends (we go back to junior high) whose real name is Elliott but whom I call Henry. That’s a whole different story for another day

ELBEE I’m on the edge of my seat.

It was a woman I’ve known casually for years. I usually stop to chat when she’s outside gardening. As we walked by, she called out, “Who’s the new one?” I answered “This is Henry.” She smiled and said, “That’s my grandson’s name.”

She was curious as to what kind of dog he was. When I told her he was a mix of Poodle and Great Pyrenees, her smile grew even bigger. Coincidentally, her grandson Henry’s family had recently gotten two Great Pyrenees.

Her grandson was so happy with the dogs that he began his Bar Mitzvah speech talking about them. He felt that it was very special to have them together because they would always have companionship and love. When his speech turned to Noah’s ark, he said he believed that Noah led the animals two by two not just to reproduce, but to keep them from feeling alone.

As she was telling me the story, I thought how great it was that something as simple as the name Henry could lead to such meaningful conversations. His demeanor also helps. He’s a little calmer and more watchful like the Great Pyrenees who are often used to guard sheep.

HENRY What’s a sheep?

Happy Halloween Henry

ELBEE Hey, who doesn’t love a little alliteration.

This week, several of the PAC teams took part in the UCLA Medical Center Halloween festivities. The Doods have done this as far back as Charley and Elbee.

Last year, with COVID, the PAC dogs did a virtual celebration with several teams on Zoom. It was fun sharing the screen and interacting, but there’s nothing like actual contact.

This year was so special because we were back in person. It was time to bring out the pumpkin costumes!

ELBEE I thought those looked familiar.

When I decided that I was going to wear one of their multi-colored wigs, I had an issue. Does one put it on at home and drive all the way to UCLA or does one put it on right before walking in. I asked one of my daughters her opinion and she suggested that one not wear it at all.

ELBEE I’m with her.

I also had a wig for Stanley but since he wasn’t in the mood, “Aunt” Carol, who always helps at Halloween, had the pleasure of wearing it. We both looked fabulous.

From the moment we met in the lobby with our dogs dressed as lions, pumpkins and even a hot dog, there was so much laughter. As we posed for a group photo, people walking by forgot their problems and stopped to capture the moment on their phones.

When we went up to the floors, the response was even better. I had almost forgotten how special it is to see a child’s face light up when a dog walks into their room or to feel the relief of their families. One very sick young man had only a slight response but his dad was almost in tears.

The hospital staff has been incredibly happy about the dogs returning. Our Halloween visit was no exception. I lost count of how many nurses, in quiet asides, told me what a physical and emotional toll the past year has taken. The dogs were the best medicine.

In my usual spirit of honesty, I have something to get off my chest. It’s about my singing.

ELBEE Singing? That noise she makes is not singing and it has nothing to do with this post.

When a friend sent me photos of myself in the mask and wig, I realized that I was unrecognizable, just like the contestants on The Masked Singer, one of my guilty pleasures. I could have burst into song and no one would have known it was me! Maybe there’s still hope.

And Happy First Halloween Henry!