Ellen Morrow – Page 21 – Me and the Doods.com

The Universe Is a Strange Place

On a beautiful morning, the Doods and I were enjoying a walk up one of our semi-regular routes, when a man started waving enthusiastically and then came running over. He’d seen me with the dogs for years and wanted to tell me how special they were. Of course, I immediately shared about all of the work they do.

ELBEE She actually bragged but I have no issue with that.

As soon as I mentioned UCLA Medical Center, the floodgates of conversation opened. The man, whose name is Montana, had suffered severe injuries in a motorcycle accident (two cars were involved) and said he owed a lot of his recovery to the hospital and to his faith.

He was telling me that he was a songwriter and musician and had worked with Bon Jovi when a lovely young woman, named Julia (pronounced with an “h”) approached. Apparently, she’s another fan of the dogs and was very excited to be petting them for the first time. And what are the chances, she was a singer songwriter who blogs about goodness.

ELBEE This woman looked better going hiking than certain other people look going out to dinner.

Being tone deaf, I couldn’t get in on the whole songwriting thing. Still, in our mutual spirit of oversharing when Julia spoke about having just written a song in Spanish although she barely speaks Spanish, I confessed that I’d recently written a children’s book. It was not something I’d ever thought about doing. It just came to me from the universe as I was climbing a steep trail.

ELBEE Oy. That’s a story for another day.

Anyone walking by would have thought we were old friends. We were laughing, playing with the dogs, taking photos. Julia even asked if it was okay if she set the photos and videos of the dogs to music. The whole encounter was getting better and better.

ELBEE Not to mention crazier and crazier.

Suddenly, Montana suggested we form a prayer circle. Never having been in a prayer circle in my life, I joined hands with them as if it was the most natural thing to do. There we were, the five of us, three relative strangers, Gus and Stanley, at the top of a busy street adjacent to the hiking trails in a prayer circle.

GUS AND STANLEY I hope none of our friends saw us.

After the prayer circle, we exchanged numbers, said our good byes and went our separate ways.

I admit this whole encounter was a bit unusual, even for me, but every word is true. I’m not even sure how it all happened except that it’s the dogs’ fault. Next week I will share a more profound story of the power of the universe.

A Bittersweet Circle of Coincidence

About a month ago I was walking the dogs in the neighborhood and ran into the rabbi from Providence Tarzana Hospital and his wife. When they stopped to pet Gus and Stanley, the rabbi, a fan of animal therapy, began telling his wife about things the Doods had accomplished. Some I didn’t even know about.

One story really stuck with me. A couple of years ago, the rabbi had seen me in the hall, I believe with Elbee and Gus, and asked us to go in to see a critically ill young woman. He shared how much peace and comfort the visit with the dogs had brought to her. Unbeknownst to me, a short time later she passed away.

This week I was at the hospital with Gus when a nurse told us that someone really wanted to see him. We walked into the room to find the patient waiting to go to surgery but alert and upbeat. Her two adult daughters, one a veterinarian and the other a sports trainer, were with her.

We immediately bonded over our love of dogs, the Dodgers and the Lakers. We were so sad about the loss of Kobe Bryant and mad about the baseball cheating scandal. The trainer daughter had worked with UCLA athletes so we cheered the great year the women’s basketball team was having. I showed them silly Christmas and New Years photos of Gus and Stanley which got a laugh from everyone.

Suddenly one of the daughters turned to me and thanked me for a visit we had done with her sister a few years before. Her sister had been so happy to see the dogs and so comforted by them. It turned out to be the very same woman the rabbi had been talking about.

After a few minutes of serious conversation, I shared with them that Stanley was my late brother’s namesake. That simple act of confiding spoke volumes. The experience of losing a sibling is different for everyone but there is a mutual understanding. I told them how warm and funny my brother was and that I was sure he was making their sister laugh.

The Canine Cupids Are Back

Once again, several of the People Animal Connection teams, including Blue Moon the miniature horse and her person Victoria, gathered at UCLA Medical Center to spread some Valentine cheer. We always meet as a group ahead of time to give the dogs a chance to settle in.

ELBEE Trust me. It’s chaos.

Gus met Blue Moon for the first time and was much calmer than Stanley had been. That really isn’t saying much since Stanley acted as if he was meeting an alien, one he’d like to play with, but still an alien. Little Bichon Finley, “sister” to Gus’s best buddy Tommy, was totally taken with the small horse. She couldn’t take her eyes off of her. It was love at first sniff.

When we split into groups to visit the floors, the loving spirit of the day became the star. Donna and I took Gus, Tommy and Finley to cheer up kids on pediatrics. A toddler sitting on the floor in the hall didn’t know whom to pet first. Seemingly special needs, her response was pure joy and her mom was thrilled.

We went into a room to visit an adolescent girl, who, from what I understood, had been in and out of the hospital for years. She was cuddled on her bed with a favorite old stuffed animal, but when the adorable threesome settled around her they were all the comfort she needed.

Someone asked the patient what was her favorite animal. Surprisingly she answered, “elephants.” What would be the chance that I’d be wearing socks with elephants on them. She laughed when I showed them to her.

ELBEE What’s the chance that anyone would be wearing socks with elephants on them?

Joining us on our rounds was Reed, proud Doodle owner and long time UCLA photographer. It was very special to have him with us because over the years he has taken pictures of so many of the PAC dogs, including all of mine. This time I turned the lens on him and captured a sweet moment with Gus.

Also in our group was a student volunteer who was handing out cards and gifts to the patients. As we were leaving the floor I asked if she’d ever seen the dogs in action before. With a huge smile on her face she said that it was her first time and she couldn’t believe what she’d seen. She’d met dogs around the hospital but had no idea of the depth of what they could accomplish. I told her I felt as if they were walking valentines.

ELBEE That is corny but touching.

A Horse Is a Horse of Course

Stanley’s second pet visit station at UCLA Medical Center was very special. Not so much because he’s grown into the job, but because of the illustrious company he was keeping.

STANLEY What does illustrious mean?

ELBEE You don’t want to know.

First there was Blue Moon, a miniature horse who does the monthly visit stations in the peace garden outside of the lobby. Adorable and smart, Blue Moon was in this year’s nationally televised Tournament of Roses Parade.

When Stanley was still a puppy we went to the Gentle Barn, an amazing animal sanctuary. He was very taken with the horses and even nuzzled a blind one named Hiro. Apparently he blocked all of that from memory. When he saw Blue Moon he was baffled. What was she? A dog? A horse?

Initially he was a little hesitant. Then he moved in closer and decided she was okay to play with so he went for the puppy “bounce.” To her credit, Blue Moon was extremely patient even though I’m sure she thought he was ridiculous.

Then we headed over to the patio on the other side of the hospital where we joined a husky named Izzy and her person Melissa. Izzy has the most beautiful blue eyes. If we combined Izzy’s eyes with Stanley’s long eyelashes, they’d have a cosmetics contract sewn up.

Izzy was recently voted America’s most popular pet on Good Morning America, so Stanley was in very good company. Although Stanley doesn’t have her credentials, the two of them were a huge hit. I lost count of how many people going in and out of the hospital stopped to pet them and take photos.

I wonder if Stanley was blocking me on purpose.

ELBEE Yes he was.

As so often happens amidst all of the dog festivity, I ended up in a serious and touching conversation. An older man approached and jokingly said that he’d like to pet Stanley but was afraid he’d want to steal him for his son.

He confided that his adult son had severe psychological issues. The man often felt that a dog would be of help. Coincidentally, I had recently read an article about organizations that were training psychiatric service dogs.

They are taught to sense anxiety and depression. They learn to stop someone who is self-harming with cutting. An agoraphobic woman said that her dog enabled her to leave the house. A very young boy with severe problems was able to return to school.

I truly wished that I’d had specifics for the man but when I shared the information I had, he was so appreciative. He was glad to have a direction where he could search for help for his son. He even took a moment to hug Stanley.

Charity Begins at the Corner

Over the years, thanks to the Doods, I’ve been fortunate enough to do so many things in addition to hospital visits. Some, like parades and parties were fun. Others, like the movie I Love You Man that I did with Charley were fabulous.

ELBEE I cannot believe she’s bringing that up again. Maybe it’s because it’s award season and she thinks she should have won an Oscar for best cameo.

I bring it up because, believe it or not, this week two random people asked if that was really me. It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

Some of the events have been incredibly touching. Gus and I recently joined a few other Pet Partners teams for A Magic Penny Volunteer Fair. Located at the corner community center just a few miles from my house, it turned out to be a very special afternoon.

A Magic Penny is a philanthropic organization that believes “through diverse and frequent volunteer events children and their parents/guardians can grow together and connect with the community.” I love their messages of spreading love through service and experiencing joy in giving.

There were several adorable Girl Scouts who had made dog blankets. When I asked which dogs they were for they answered, “homeless dogs, shelter dogs, oh just any dogs who need them.”

Two teenage boys were sitting at a table encouraging people to write personal thank you notes to first responders. With the year we’ve had in California, people were happy to have a chance to express their gratitude.

I spoke with a woman whose son has severe autism and is non-verbal. She is trying to influence businesses to become inclusive for people with serious issues rather than exclusive. Another woman was selling jewelry that she had made but was donating the profits to charity.

Throughout the afternoon, as I learned about all of the good work being done and shared what Gus and the other dogs did, there was such a sense of mutual purpose. And of course Gus was in his element working the crowd.

There was a moment of excitement when a fire truck from the nearby station pulled up in front of the center. It was a special treat for the kids and of course for Gus and yours truly. We had the chance to meet the fire fighters and celebrate their heroic work during the devastating wildfires.

I realize that the positivity in this post may seem a bit over the top even for me. It’s just that in the midst of these difficult and often tragic times, I was grateful to be even a small part of an event that celebrated kindness, courage and generosity.

He Reached Out for a Hand

There are some hospital visits that are so stunningly visual that I wish I could share photos but with respect for patient confidentiality that’s impossible. Gus recently had an encounter just like that.

We were on the pediatric floor at Providence Tarzana Regional Medical Center when a young girl who loved dogs saw us walk by and requested a visit. The only problem was that the six year old boy in the bed closest to the door was afraid of dogs.

After the nurse checked and got the okay from him and his mom, we went into the room. The fact that Gus, one of the most non-intimidating dogs around, looks like cotton candy may have helped.

We walked past his bed to visit the other patient. When I put Gus on her bed so that she could pet him and brush him, the boy watched silently and reached out for his mother’s hand.

Then the girl gave a very enthusiastic “yes” when I asked if she’d like to see Gus do some tricks. She laughed and clapped as Gus danced, played peek-a-boo and rolled over.

The tricks must have done the trick. Almost in spite of himself, the boy was drawn in.

ELBEE Please tell me she didn’t say that.

I could sense him relaxing as he let go of his mother’s hand. Then I saw the flicker of a smile on his face. When we were getting ready to leave I asked, “Would you like me to bring him closer?” He nodded yes so I took one step closer. Then I asked again and took another step toward him. He started giggling as it became a game.

When we reached the side of his bed, he seemed hesitant so I picked Gus up and held him away. Then, I’m not quite sure how it happened, but at the boy’s urging Gus ended up sitting on his bed. Then he tentatively began petting him.

When I glanced over at his mom she looked shocked. She shared that a few years back her son had been bitten by a dog. He’d become so afraid that he hadn’t touched one since.

The whole interaction with the six year old letting go of his mom and playing with Gus brought to mind a beautiful expression. “I reached out for a hand and found a paw.”

There is an amazing PS to this story. The next time I went to the hospital, the child life specialist told me that the little boy had asked his mom if he could get a dog.

Stanley’s Perfect Day

Stanley is more attention seeking then the average Doodle and that’s saying a lot. On a scale of one to ten, he’s probably a ten. He’s like the poster child for attention seeking. At home, he borders on being a stalker.

The other morning I was brushing my teeth when I saw the bathroom door open just a bit. There was Stanley staring at me.

STANLEY I’m kind of hurt by that stalker remark. My therapist says that I’m just a little co-dependent.

ELBEE That’s my boy.

Recently, I was asked if we could do a stress busters event on the same day that we visit the adult day health center. The timing was right and it was around the corner, so I figured why not. It turned out to be Stanley’s most perfect outing yet.

From the moment we walked into the adult center, Stanley acted as if he was greeting fans. And in a way, I guess he was. The staff had listed on the activity board that Stanley was going to be there so the participants were eagerly awaiting his arrival.

An older man, who always greets us enthusiastically, rushed toward the entrance as soon as he heard the front door chime. A severely autistic man who likes to spend a few minutes with Stanley came over to see him. As we made our way around the large room, we were accompanied by a very depressed man who only began smiling when Gus and Elbee visited. He now smiles for Stanley. All of the regulars were waving Stanley over, telling him how happy they were that he was back.

ELBEE I have tears in my eyes. I miss everyone there but I’m so proud.

Leaving the center, I drove a short distance to Granada Hills Charter High School. Just like UCLA does at Powell Library, many other schools are getting on board and holding stress buster events during finals. I could feel Stanley’s excitement when we entered the huge room filled with eager students.

As groups of kids took turns gathering around him and three other dogs, Stanley was in his glory. He flopped on the floor, went in for belly rubs, lay still for petting and cuddling. He had another captive audience and hammed it up for all he was worth.

My job main job that afternoon, as it always is with the dogs, was to watch out for Stanley’s well-being. I had to be sure that he wasn’t too stressed or too tired. From what I observed, I would say that Stanley was one of the most relaxed stress busters I’ve ever seen!

An Unexpected Gift of Kindness

ELBEE Didn’t she rip off the title of this post from Honda? Can they sue her?

CHARLEY I don’t think so.

I had an encounter recently that definitely could have gone the wrong way. Instead, thanks to someone having an honest outlook and owning her behavior, it took a direct turn into the positive.

ELBEE Let me point out that it was a stranger with the good attitude.

There’s a picturesque residential street in the San Fernando Valley that’s become a popular walking area. It’s surrounded by the Santa Monica mountains with trailheads leading up from the side. There are beautiful gated homes and amazing views. It’s also a gradual uphill for about a mile so it’s a good work out.

The Doods and I were just beginning our walk in a particularly busy area near the bottom. Suddenly a white car came speeding down the hill and blew through the stop sign right next to us. Startled, I waved for them to slow down.

ELBEE That was not a wave!

To my surprise, the car came to a sudden halt. When the driver leaned over and rolled down the passenger window, I was expecting the worst. Instead, the female driver said, “I’m so sorry.” She confessed that she had been in a hurry and not paying attention to how she was driving. She felt particularly bad because I had two dogs with me. She even said “And there are three of you.” She thanked me for calling it to her attention. Then, she looked me right in the eye and added, “I appreciate you.” I immediately responded, “I appreciate you too.”

And I truly did. Not the stop sign part but the way she responded to the whole situation. In the times we’re living in, civility is often forgotten. We could have been part of a road rage incident. It could have been in the paper and they would have given my age.

ELBEE There’s her main concern.

Instead, a stranger made a mistake, graciously apologized and taught me a lesson about human kindness. In this new year, that was a special gift.

My Gratitude List (In No Particular Order)

For many years, the mountains have been my spiritual, creative space, my sanctuary. Recently, climbing up a steep trail on a magnificent winter morning, I was overwhelmed with a sense of pure gratitude. When I reached the top, the spectacular ocean views took my breath away.

ELBEE The steep climb may have been what took her breath away. She’s no spring chicken.

The view, and also some guilt, inspired me to write this post. On Thanksgiving, during the five minutes that we sit around the table before total chaos erupts, my granddaughter Samantha likes us to share what we’re grateful for. Being put on the spot, I’m incapable of expressing my gratitude and instead end up laughing hysterically.

Two of my thank you’s are bittersweet. The first is to Riley our loving, beautiful Golden who left us last year. He was the voice of reason in a house full of Doodles.

The second is to Elbee, yes Elbee, who also left us last year. Character that he was, he did such incredible work. He also inspired my voice with his. Which reminds me, I think I’ve found his spirit animal.

ELBEE I am truly touched.

It’s a raven that follows over head when I’m hiking alone and never shuts up.

ELBEE I take it back.

To all my Doods, thank you for guiding me on this therapy dog journey which is now in its fourteenth year. Charley, you trained me. Elbee you challenged me.

Gus you are a bundle of sweetness. When your first family had to find you a new home, the mom said to me, “I want you to give him a good life.” You have made my life better.

Stanley you are a lovable goof who is growing into the job. You often surprise me…usually in a good way.

I am grateful for the friendships in my life. Thank you to my long time friends whom I may not see often but who are always there for me. Thank you to the friends I see more frequently for your support and understanding. You keep this insecure writer going. Thank you to my mountain buddies. I may not know your names, but I treasure the camaraderie when we meet on the trails.

I want to include a special note of appreciation to the nurses, doctors, therapists, and other hospital staff. Many of you go as far back as Charley. You have taught me so much about kindness, compassion and healing.

Last, but absolutely not least, thank you to my wonderful family for laughing at me and for making me laugh. You are my joy, my heart, my lifeblood. I love you more than words can express.

ELBEE Hey, last is still last.

HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM ME AND THE DOODS!

A Christmas Gift Exchange

Donna, my Yom Kippur co-conspirator, and I have made it a tradition to go into UCLA Medical Center on Christmas Day. When people see her two Bichons, Tommy and Finley, and their “cousin” Gus, the joy and relief are almost palpable.

We did the majority of our visits in the Pediatric ICU, one of Donna’s regular units. To say the staff was excited to see us would be an understatement. I can only imagine how difficult it is to be working in the hospital on Christmas, especially with critically ill children.

The nurses kept thanking us for being there. Watching them laughing, hugging the dogs and taking pictures I wanted to say thank you to them. After a few minutes, we started down the hall to cheer up the patients.

A fourteen year old girl with cancer, whom I believe had lost most of her hair to chemo, was sitting up in bed. As soon as Tommy and Finley settled around her, a smile crept onto her face. Then it was Gus’s turn. The smile grew even bigger, as she buried her hand in his hair. Despite being very ill and needing help to pet the dogs, she shared her happiness with us.

During another visit, as the patient, a little girl who badly wanted a dog, was loving on Tommy and Finley, her spirited older brother was trying to get Gus to dance. The hospital is a tough place for siblings.

Some of the special encounters took place from the hall. We were told that a toddler sitting up in a crib loved dogs but she was in isolation so we couldn’t go into her room. When we brought the three dogs to the doorway and had Gus do a trick or two, we heard baby excitement.

One child was neutropenic so again we had to visit from the doorway. It was hard to gauge the response, but as we started to walk away, Donna saw a small hand reach out.

In the lobby we ran into a man pushing his son in a wheelchair. A few weeks prior when Donna had visited, the boy hadn’t been able to pet Tommy and Finley. Christmas was a different story. As we held the dogs up for him to touch we were gifted with two big grins, one from the patient and one from his dad.

All in all, the morning was a priceless gift exchange. The dogs, wrapped in their Christmas bows, brought so much unconditional love and comfort to the hospital. In return, the special moments and small miracles that we were privileged to witness were precious presents for me and Donna.