Author: Ellen Morrow

ELBEE I am so glad to see the word “mellow” in the title of this post. I certainly don’t need a competing diva in the house. Do you remember when Mariah and Nicki Minaj were on a judging panel together? It was a disaster.

Over the past year since Charley’s been gone, friends have been assuring me that he’d find me another dog.

ELBEE Did she honestly think it was just going to show up and ring the doorbell?

I guess I was hoping for that kind of a miracle. Instead, as I wrote last week, I was in the mountains standing under “Charley’s tree” when I suddenly felt that he wanted me to start the search.

ELBEE I’m totally on board with this. I’m actually looking for a personal assistant.

For the record, I immediately checked rescues, even Doodle rescues, and couldn’t find the right dog. I read stories and looked at countless photos but none of them spoke to me. So, despite the Jewish guilt, which my friend told me is a bad as Catholic guilt, I started researching puppies.

Since then I’ve been a woman on a mission. I don’t think I put this much thought into it when I was having children (sorry daughters). What makes it especially difficult is that I’m really hoping to find my next therapy dog, a very pampered pet with a job. I’ve been so incredibly fortunate with the Doods. Can it possibly happen again?

Today I spoke to a head hunter for a large corporation to see if I could hire him. Just kidding. Elbee, Gus and I were visiting my friend Roberta, who continues her courageous fight against cancer, and I tried to get some free advice from her husband Ira. He doesn’t work with dogs.

ELBEE AND GUS That was embarrassing.

The oldest daughter, the most “just get it done” of the three, told me I was making too big a deal out of it. She said that I should go on line, find a puppy and order it, kind of like shoes. To make her point she sent me photos of two of the cutest Goldendoodle puppies I’ve ever seen. When I asked her where they were from she said she thought they were from some place in Alabama. By sheer coincidence, it turns out they were from the same breeder as Gus. Is that a sign?

In my usual spirit of honesty and oversharing, I admit that I’m obsessing about finding the right dog. At people’s suggestions, I looked at Sheepadoodles and Bernadoodles but I drew the line at Schnoodles. It made me realize that I have a soft spot for Goldendoodles although I have been  tempted by some very cute Labradoodles.

This morning while I was walking the dogs, I had one of those brief but meaningful encounters that I have from time to time. An absolutely charming woman, kind of Mary Poppins-ish, stopped to admire them and told me that she had four Pekinese. As we chatted, of course I shared my dilemma. She totally got it. She  crossed her fingers, gave me a knowing smile and said “good luck.” It was as if Charley had sent her.

ELBEE Oy vey!

For me, the month of March is an emotional cocktail of highs and lows.

ELBEE Oh no. Here she goes oversharing again.

Last year I wrote a post for my beloved, funny brother Stan, the unofficial Jewish dog whisperer. His birthday was March third. Sadly, he passed away at 47 but I did inherit Larry, his brilliant Border Collie/Aussie mix.

ELBEE I’m not sure if that last sentence is appropriate.

GUS I think it’s sweet that Larry helped her.

Somehow I had forgotten that my dad passed away in March. It was a long time ago when I was a senior in high school. The other night, as I was lighting a candle for him, I realized that even after all these years, he’s a big part of my March emotions.

It’s hard to believe that it’s been a year since my gentle giant Charley left us on a March morning, so suddenly but with such grace. The student athlete event that he worked the night before his death is coming up again.

On the bright side, Elbee, Gus and Riley, our Golden Retriever and senior pack member, all celebrate birthdays this month. Elbee even shares a birthday with my son-in-law Jay.

ELBEE That’s ironic. As you may know, Jay is a cat person.

Yesterday I was up in the Santa Monica Mountains for a “mental health” hike,” appreciating how beautiful it is this time of year. Side note to the daughters, I saw a bumper sticker that said, “Wandering does not mean you’re lost.” Back to the mountains. It was breezy and cool. The summer heat hadn’t set it. The rattle snakes without issues were still sleeping. The first blooms of the wild flowers were peeking their heads out.  

I was totally at peace, enjoying the  views and the tranquility. Thinking about my hikes with Charley, I headed down a short steep hill that reminds me of him. He would always stand at the top, under the same tree, before following me down.

Call me crazy, but over the past year so many people have told me that Charley would somehow find me the right dog that I kept waiting for a sign. More than once, it drew me to that spot in the mountains where I would stand and look out at the ocean and hope for that sign.

Yesterday, resting in the shade of “his” tree, I knew with certainty that it was time to start the search for another dog. Maybe that was Charley’s message, a message of new beginnings.

Elbee and Gus are doing amazing things so how wonderful would it be to have another one learn from them. Although at ten Elbee continues to be a hard working diva, I know he can use some back up.

The thought of finding the right dog, a dog that will learn from and help Elbee and Gus, is overwhelming but exciting at the same time. It won’t be a replacement for Charley since he can never be replaced. Instead, I hope that it will continue to honor the memory of Charley and all of the other beautiful  therapy dogs that will never be forgotten.

More on my search next week.

ELBEE Finally a good title. I like where this is going.

Wednesday when I was getting ready to go to UCLA, I hadn’t quite decided whom to take with me. Apparently Elbee had, because he started stalking me around the house.

ELBEE I wouldn’t call it stalking, well maybe a little, but I was ready to go to work. Is it so wrong that I enjoy the extra attention. Besides, I was still hurt that Gus had gone without me on Valentines Day.

We all know that Elbee is a diva. The thing is that when you give a diva an audience, magic can happen. The dog who bugs everyone at the groomer with his barking, is suddenly a star. This week he was at the top of his game.

Elbee didn’t just walk into the neuropsych units, he made an entrance. I’m sure he considers the therapists and the patients to be his fan base. I will admit that he has an uncanny ability to remember people he’s met.

Elbee and Gus generally visit with groups, starting with the kids under 12 and working their way up to adults. Whereas Gus is great with groups, he seems to thrive on one on one visits, I think Elbee gets bored.

ELBEE   Excuse my A.D.D. And I think we know someone else with the same issue.

He loves the groups, especially groups of teenagers. When they gather around him on the floor, he enthusiastically flops into their laps. This week, one boy was particularly taken with Elbee. The teen was sweet and friendly. Laughing, he applauded all the tricks.

I later learned that the patient had been difficult and unhappy. Elbee’s obvious joy and total lack of judgement had drawn the young man away from his problems.

ELBEE It’s a gift. I wonder if I should do a podcast.

Speaking of gifts, as were leaving, we received the most beautiful post-Valentine presents. The patients, along with the therapists, had made dog biscuits and  cards just to say thank you.

ELBEE By the way, the biscuits were fabulous. Pack Leader should get the recipe. Oh wait, she doesn’t bake.

After we left the neuropsych floor, the “Elbee show” continued in the lobby. A teenage girl, who remembered Elbee from the times that she had been in the hospital, came running over to hug him. She asked if he could please do some of his tricks. When I said “sure” she called her friends to come over and watch. Before I knew it, we were surrounded by families, visitors and staff as the diva did a command performance.

Last week I wrote about the ripple effect of the dogs. This made me think about it in another way. Because of one girl who remembered a therapy dog that had been special to her, there was a crowd of smiling people. Elbee had made their day.

Recently, I attended a meeting at UCLA where I was moved to tears. A few members of the People Animal Connection were invited to a board meeting with the Friends of Semel, the Institute for Neuroscience. We were there to relate special experiences we’d had while working in the neuropsych units as well as other areas of the hospital. Of course, our canine partners were there too.

Lynne and her Golden Retriever Leo had received a letter from a woman who, as a result of difficult circumstances, had spent an extended time in the psych unit. In an honest, beautifully written note, the patient expressed her gratitude for the essential part they’d played in her recovery. There was not a dry eye in the room as Lynne read the raw, heartfelt words.

Jane, a long time PAC volunteer, shared about two different patients who had done pictures of her dogs. These were such generous gifts from people who were suffering from major emotional or psychological issues. The first is a painting of her late, sweet Daisy. The second is of Bubbles, her fun-loving Lab who was at the meeting that morning.

Erin Rice, the director of PAC, told an incredible story that exemplifies the  power of our dogs. As part of the No One Dies Alone Program, Delancey, a black Lab, was brought in to sit with a man in his late thirties who was unresponsive and actively dying. Initially, even as they put his hands on the dog, there was no response. Then, miraculously and to the amazement of the family members crowded into his hospital room, the patient woke up and began communicating with his loved ones. Everyone had the chance to say their goodbyes. A few hours later he passed away peacefully.

We all nodded our heads as we heard about agitated, disruptive patients who calmed down while they were petting one of our dogs. We also related to stories about patients who, after long periods of withdrawal or depression, suddenly smiled or spoke during a visit.

As I listened to the stories and shared some of my own, it was overwhelming to think about the far reaching effects of the dogs, even at UCLA alone. PAC started in 1994 with only a few dogs. Today there are over seventy in the program. Can you imagine if each handler shared just one story?

I also thought about the ripple effect. For each patient who is helped by one of the dogs, how many others enjoy the benefits? For each sick child who giggles in delight as a PAC dog cuddles on the bed, there may be a mom, a dad, a brother a sister, or even a grateful staff member who will never forget that moment.

ELBEE OMG she stole the title of this post from a UCLA email about the Valentines Day event.

Okay, yes I did but it was better than anything I could come up with. As for the event, you know how sometimes you throw a party and everything just seems to come together? That’s what Wednesday was like. Several dogs from the People Animal Connection, all decked out for the holiday, were there to celebrate. Gus looked a little embarrassed when I put heart tinsel and a red hat on him but that was nothing compared to Gracie and Baylee in their cute dresses

Instead of traveling around the hospital in a “pack” as we usually do for Christmas caroling, we split up into small groups delivering cards and gifts to patients and staff all over the hospital. I think because we went into so many areas simultaneously, the atmosphere became very festive. There were countless smiles. There was laughter. There were wagging tails.

Gus was paired up with his buddy Tommy. By the way, kudos to Tommy for remaining humble even though a fellow Bichon had won Westminster the day before. From the executive offices, to the Emergency Department to Maddie’s room, where anxious family members wait for news about their loved ones in surgery, the dynamic duo worked their magic. The phrase that Tommy’s person Donna and I heard over and over again was, “That is just so much cuteness.”

ELBEE Pardon the interruption, but I think I’m going to be sick. And no, I’m not jealous.

Later in the morning, teams gathered outside the hospital for a pet visit station. It was there that the party kicked into high gear. We gave out cards, candy and gifts but the dogs were the best valentines. A young girl in a wheel chair giggled as we brought the dogs to her. Toddlers holding onto parents’ hands stopped in wide-eyed wonder. Patients, families and staff members came outside to say hello. I can’t even count how many times I heard someone say, “This made my day.”

I was in a very upbeat mood when I headed to the car with Gus. Then I turned on the radio and heard about the mass shooting in Florida. It was a shooting so awful that there is no way to minimize the horror. What brought it home even more was that two of my cousins graduated from Marjory S. Douglas High School years ago. How sad that this is the second time in one of my posts that I’ve felt the need to mention a mass shooting out of respect for the people who were directly impacted.

Our dogs spent the morning at UCLA cheering everyone up, bringing them moments of joy. Now there are dogs in Florida who are working selflessly to help with the healing process in the aftermath of another unspeakable tragedy.