dogaholics – Me and the Doods.com

Sharing Joy

After a natural disaster like the wildfires in Maui, I feel a bit insensitive writing my regular post. I have great memories of taking our daughters to Lahaina when they were little. It’s hard to believe the town is gone. My prayers are with them.

My hope is that I can offer you some positivity by sharing special moments I’ve had with the Doods. If I can bring you a bit of joy, I’m grateful.

Some interactions are seemingly so simple. In the under twelve neuropsych unit at UCLA, a little boy was clutching a feather as he sat with our group. When I was getting ready to leave with Stanley, he came up to me, handed me the feather and said very quietly, “I want you to have this.” I could tell how much it meant to him.

Walking in the neighborhood with Henry, I passed a house with a man and woman standing in the front yard. Henry, of course, stopped to watch them. The man was happy to see him. The woman, not so much. She admitted she wasn’t a “dog person” and was a bit OCD about dog hair.

Not sure how Henry did it, but within minutes the woman was petting him and saying that he was “mesmerizing.” She began calling for her two teenage sons to come out to meet him. It was love at first sight. They wanted him to move in. As we left, they all, including the mom, were smiling and said “Please, stop by any time.”

In recent weeks, I’ve mentioned bringing Henry and Gus to visit with the high school students in the Turner-UCLA internship. It’s a program for kids who are interested in the health care field. This week I brought Stanley with Gus.

“Aunt” Carol, who handles Gus, and I hid outside of the auditorium with the dogs until everyone was seated. When we walked in with the canine guests, it set the tone for the whole class. It was like a surprise party.

They were all very attentive and had lots of questions when Jen, director of the People Animal connection, showed a video and spoke to them about the human/ animal bond. When it was time to interact with the dogs, it was just so joyous. They even wanted to select the accessories for Gus and Stanley to wear in their group photo.

During Jen’s presentation, a picture of Charley, Elbee and puppy Gus, my first three therapy dogs popped up. Gus is now the senior in an incredibly copacetic pack with Stanley and Henry.

It made me reflect on how much comfort, love and joy they’ve brought me over the years. I wish I could share them with everyone.

The Good, the Bad, the Happy, the Sad (In No Particular Order)

By no stretch of the imagination am I a morning person but there I was yesterday out with Stanley before seven a.m. Blame it on the heat wave which, as far as I’m concerned, absolutely sucks.

Around the corner, I ran into a woman whom I know casually from walking in the neighborhood. She loves the Doods.

ELBEE She doesn’t even know her name but they chat like old friends.

As she stopped to pet Stanley, we commiserated about the weather. She admitted that it was really depressing her. I was so relieved to hear her say that because I’ve been feeling the same way! It’s true that misery loves company.

ELBEE Seriously? She was relieved to hear that someone was depressed?

Unfortunately, I’ve seen people walking their dogs during the heat of the day, not realizing that the sidewalks are hot enough to burn their paws. There has been a lot about it in the news but in good conscience I just wanted to mention it.

Now, on to the positive.

ELBEE Finally!

Gus and Henry worked a special event together. A few weeks ago, Henry had his first official “gig” with the Turner-UCLA Internship, a program for high school kids interested in careers in health care. It went so well the last time, I thought why not bring two.

ELBEE Notice how her hair looks like Gus and Henry’s?

Kristen from PAC gave a great talk and showed a moving video, followed by a question and answer session, but the kids’ interactions with the dogs taught them more about the human/animal bond than any words ever could.

By the way, Gus isn’t in the photos because he was sprawled on the floor for belly rubs.

In my last post, I wrote about a minor miracle. In a matter of hours, my seven year old grandson Ryder went from being terrified of the dogs to dressing them up in costume and posing for pictures. It began when my son-in-law Jay thought that Henry’s gentle nature might help.

The change was absolutely amazing. I told Ryder that I was very proud of him and asked how he did it. His response was, “I have no idea.” I am happy to say that it just got better and better.

On a bittersweet note, July twenty-second marked twenty seven years since my brother Stan passed. Although it’s incredibly sad that he left us so early, his funny, caring spirit is always with me. Come to think of it, as a total animal lover, he may have had a part in Ryder’s change of heart.

Halloween in July

This week’s post was nearly finished but then an unexpected grandkids/dogs encounter was too much fun not to share.

My daughter Danielle, her husband Jay and their kids Bella and Ryder arrived from San Jose this morning. Bella loves the dogs. Seven year old Ryder, not so much. He’s never been a fan of dogs, especially large, long-haired ones that crave attention. Doodles do not like to be ignored.

Ryder’s reaction has always been one of sheer terror. We had to make sure that he and the dogs stayed in totally separate parts of the house or we’d hear a lot of yelling. Over time, he’d kind of gotten used to Gus and even nicknamed him “Cloud.” Big Stanley was still “Pain in the Butt.” Then giant Henry joined the pack.

You can only imagine the chaos today with the three dogs wanting to greet everyone and Ryder wanting to go home. For awhile we kept them as far apart as possible. Then Jay, who hadn’t seen Henry since he was a slightly goofy puppy, was so taken with how calm he’d become, he thought that Henry might be the way to help Ryder overcome his fear.

It was a process, but with Jay’s encouragement, Ryder ended up sitting quietly with Henry and petting him. Eventually, I’m truly not sure how it happened, Ryder was in the bedroom with all three. With Bella’s help, I started showing some of the dogs’ silly photos to Ryder. Then I brought out their basket of props, always a hit with the children we visit in the hospital.

Before I knew it, my grandkids were putting funny glasses and headbands on themselves and on the dogs. They got very excited when I asked if they wanted to see the special dresser where I kept the dogs’ holiday costumes.

As soon as Ryder found the Halloween drawer, he was ready for a photo shoot. He started pulling out accessories, planning it all. He even ran upstairs to find more. It was incredible to watch him.

Since Danielle is an excellent photographer, we enlisted her to do the honors. Against her will, she agreed. She kept apologizing to the dogs as I dressed them up and mumbled about reporting me to PETA. I think I also heard the words, “crazy grandma.”

Getting them all in front of the fireplace was a little chaotic but there was so much laughter. Watching Ryder go from screaming about the dogs to posing with all three with a smile on his face was a little miracle.

It’s My Birthday and I’ll Hike If I Want To

ELBEE Why does that title make me want to sing?

Several years ago, I began the tradition of doing a challenging birthday hike. The first one was up a really steep local trail nicknamed the “butt burner.” After a few years, I realized that July was not the best month for that.

ELBEE Her daughters put it a little differently. “Mom, are you insane?”

I thought about changing my birthday to November but then came up with a much simpler plan. I’d hike from the San Fernando Valley to the sea, going from the heat to the ocean breezes. It’s worked out pretty well so far but this month there has basically been a national heat wave. I briefly reconsidered, then, decided to go for it.

ELBEE Guess what her daughters had to say about that.

I’m happy to report that I’m home safe and sound, except for a few cuts and bruises, and did not have to be rescued by helicopter. That will never happen because the first thing they do is give your age on the news. Then people comment, “What was that old lady doing up there in this weather?”

For some reason, that reminds me of an annoying commercial. A gray haired woman of a certain age, whatever that means, says, “Age is just a number and mine is unlisted.” I should try out for that. I can be annoying. By the way, thank you to my granddaughter Bella who finds me “entertaining” rather than annoying.

Back to the hike. It was wonderful, tiring, but wonderful. The views, as always, were a gift. There was such a feeling of freedom. Being in the mountains for my birthday gives me time to reflect.

ELBEE Once again she asked a total stranger to take her picture.

There is a sense of challenge when I start out in Reseda and a sense of accomplishment when I arrive at Temescal Gateway Park. For the moment, aging is on the back burner.

As he did last year, my husband Doug picked me up at the “finish line,” with Henry along for the ride. It’s like a birthday present. It’s also a sweet part of the tradition. He even brought the silly sunglasses.

GUS & STANLEY Sorry to break the mood but we feel very left out. Why didn’t Doug bring us? We’re extremely festive.

Good Morning Gus

**Bringing comfort to Tarzana Hospital**

Gus is truly a people pleaser, particularly when he goes into the hospital. Recently he had a morning that was special even for him. He was making his usual “rounds” with the patients in Resnick Neuropsych at UCLA.

While in our first unit, the kids under twelve, he had a very unexpected challenge. An adorable little boy, of around eight or nine, at first smiled when he saw Gus. Then suddenly, due to Tourette’s syndrome, a difficult neuromuscular disorder, he began yelling and making extremely erratic movements. He calmed down between outbursts.

Gus took it all in stride. He sat very still, tilting his head from side to side as he intently watched the boy. It was almost as if he understood.

Our next stop was the teen unit. One of the boys got so excited when Gus walked in, he almost applauded. On my prior visit with Stanley, the boy had told me that Gus was a star and he couldn’t wait to meet him. Apparently Gus’s reputation had preceded him. He has fans.

ELBEE I can relate.

Hugging Gus, with a huge grin on his face, the teen said he was going home that day. He was just so happy that he hadn’t left before he’d had the chance to meet Gus in person.

My little star had more positive interactions with the young adults. As he sprawled on the floor for belly rubs, he kept his front paw draped over a woman’s leg. She looked over at me in wonder and said, “I think he really likes me.”

Another woman seemed very reserved, but chatted quietly, sharing about her dog, as she sat next to me on the floor petting Gus. It was only as we were leaving the unit that I learned from the therapist that the woman barely leaves her room and never talks to anyone. I am always so grateful when they let me know the impact the dogs are having.

Later in the week, Jen, the director of PAC, said she had a present for me. It was from another one of the boys in the teen unit. He’d told her it was extremely important to him that I receive it. When I opened the envelope and saw this whimsical drawing of Gus, the emotion behind it brought tears to my eyes.

A Positively Positive Walk with Henry

It always seems that when you’re walking a dog, you make a lot more connections with other people. With a dog Henry’s size it’s an adventure because it’s so hard to ignore him.

A woman driving by yelled from her car, “I just want to hug him.” An older man commented on how much Henry had grown since the last time he’d seen him a few months ago. Then he kind of whispered, “Im really a cat person but Henry is a star.”

A jovial woman standing in her driveway waved us over so that she could meet Henry. She and her husband had seen us around the neighborhood. Explaining that her husband was a “jokester,” she shared that whenever they spotted us he’d ask, “Whose hair do you think looks better today, hers or the dog’s?”

ELBEE Definitely Henry’s

As we were heading down the hill from her house, a car started slowly backing up next to us, making me kind of nervous. Then the driver’s window rolled down and the woman behind the wheel said, “I didn’t mean to scare you but my kids wanted to see your dog.” As she lowered the back window, I saw a little girl and her brother smiling and waving to Henry. Of course I had him wave back and play peek-a-boo.

ELBEE She can’t help herself.

Henry spotted a group of workmen and tugged on his leash to go greet them. Since I had heard some Spanish, I told them his name was Enrique. As we were chatting, one of them said to his friend, “se parece a su perro,” she looks like her dog. They were surprised when I started laughing. Of course I told them about being in I Love You Man with Charley, my first look alike dog.

ELBEE She let them think she was an actress.

On a different positive note, Henry worked his first official “gig” at UCLA. He met with a group of high school students interested in careers in the health care field. They were there to learn about the healing power of the human/animal bond. Jen, the manager of PAC gave a great talk and showed a very moving video but the kids’ smiling interactions with Henry said it all.

Everything’s Coming Up Roses

Usually when I write about a birthday, it’s for one of the Doods.

ELBEE Or for herself

This time it’s for my husband Doug. He’s not a big fan of birthdays but the people he works with love to celebrate. Although it’s the Tarzana Wound Care Center, I truly think of it as simply a care center. Everyone on the staff is so warm and welcoming.

They all love it when any of the dogs visit so I decided to bring Stanley to the party. They were extremely helpful when I was training him for his Pet Partners testing. Now that he’s been volunteering in the hospital for a few years, it feels like a full circle moment whenever we come in.

Stanley didn’t disappoint. There was so much joy when he arrived, it was as if he was the guest of honor. The birthday accessories didn’t hurt either. Even Doug wore a “celebrate” headband.

Gus and Henry are also favorites. Recently, when the center was short staffed for a day, I came in to help out with assistant Gus in the morning and assistant Henry in the afternoon. Let’s just say that the dogs were more helpful than I was.

ELBEE Amen to that.

There were a lot of pleasantly surprised patients that day. One woman was visibly distressed when she walked in. As soon as I brought Gus into the waiting room, I could see her body language relax.

As for the roses in the title, anyone who knows my husband well, knows how much he loves roses. He grew them for years. A few weeks before his birthday, rose bushes started appearing all over the area outside of his window at the wound center. We were convinced that someone was planting them as a very special, birthday surprise.

Turns out it was just a happy coincidence. The building manager thought it would be a nice touch.

ELBEE Get ready. Here comes the Debbie Downer part of her post.

A few nights ago, someone dug up two of the rose bushes and stole them. Speaking with a man who works security in the neighborhood, I found out that’s a “thing” now. The next morning, a little old lady, not me, with a pair of clippers was caught taking enough roses for a huge bouquet.

ELBEE So guard your rose bushes.

On a more positive note, thank you so much to the entire staff at the center. You touch me with your kindness. And a very happy birthday to my husband Doug. You are an amazing human being who has dedicated your life to helping others. The Doods and I love you.

The Post That Almost Wasn’t

I was about to write a post about why I wasn’t going to write a post this week.

ELBEE That makes no sense whatsoever.

Then the universe sent me a sign. I picked up two packets of Truvia. One read, “Share Your Voice.” The other read, “Challenge yourself.”

ELBEE I don’t think that her idol, the late writer Erma Bombeck, got her inspiration from artificial sweetener.

I also heard someone say that gratitude was the right attitude, so I decided to share a totally random list of positivity, most of it inspired by the Doods.

June gloom has become joyous. It’s the perfect weather for walking the dogs any time of day. Plus, despite the gray skies, the mountains, my happy place, are more beautiful than ever with bursts of color from the flowers.

2. In another added touch, people have been building cairns, stone markers, all along the trails. I have no idea how they do it, but they’re like art installations.

3. The racing bike riders may be my nemeses at times, but thanks to Stanley I had a sweet encounter. Someone heard Stanley’s name and wondered how I’d chosen it. After I shared about my late, wonderful brother Stan, he told me that was his middle name. His buddy was named Larry, just like Stan’s treasured dog.

4. Dressing up the dogs is one of my favorite pastimes. Thanks to the UCLA calendar photo shoot, I had a legitimate reason to put them in costume. Sending photos to my daughters, who think I’m crazy for doing it, makes it that much better. They’ve threatened to report me to PETA but I think they’re kidding.

ELBEE They’re not.

5. A man saw me walking Henry by his house and asked if I took my dogs to the hospital. When I said “yes” he called for his wife to join us. Elbee and Charley had visited her at Tarzana Hospital twelve years ago and she felt they had helped save her life.

6. Last week Gus and three of his canine co-workers were stress busters for UCLA students taking finals. Over a hundred grateful kids stopped by the library to take a break.

7. Talk about random, thanks to the Doods I have become casual friends with several mail carriers in our neighborhood, the nicest group of people. The other day I suggested to one, who parks his truck and walks his route, that he could start a fitness class and let people follow him around.

ELBEE Sadly, she’s not kidding.

8. I was saving the best for last. My grandson Ryan graduated from high school and his sister Samantha graduated from middle school.

Try writing your own list of random positivity. It’ll make your day!

Connection & Coincidence

I recently read an article that said the key factor that determines life satisfaction and health isn’t money or even achievement. It’s “warm connections with other people.” As a basic loner who got even more so after Covid, I knew I was in trouble.

ELBEE Sad but true.

**Greeting people at the wound care center**

To make matters worse, it was a years long study by a Harvard psychiatrist. On the bright side, he determined that even casual connections can have real benefits. That’s where the dogs come in. Thanks to them, I interact with more people in an hour than I might in a week.

For instance, a few days ago I had a wonderful conversation with a man at the gym who always seemed very nice but generally kept to himself. Somehow, we got onto the subject of dogs.

ELBEE Maybe because someone asked her in a loud voice “Aren’t you the crazy dog lady?”

He smiled when he heard that and quietly told me he volunteers at a shelter. I commented on how difficult that must be and thanked him for doing it. Then, of course, I shared about the Doods. What are the chances that his thesis was on the human/animal bond. To make it even crazier, he’d gone to school in Ithaca, just outside of Syracuse, my hometown.

As we chatted about New York, I mentioned that I was born in Liberty, a small town in the Catskill Mountains. Growing up, I’d spent summers there at my grandparents’ resort. I couldn’t believe it when he told me that he spent his summers in the Catskills too! His family stayed at Grossingers, only a few miles away. I still don’t know his name but we had a warm connection of nostalgic coincidence.

The ending of this post is kind of a P.S. that wrote itself. My husband Doug and I decided at the last minute to go to the gym last night at a very random time. Talk about coincidence. As we walked in, I saw the man I’d been writing about. He had been just as amazed about our conversation and had shared it with his girlfriend.

By the way, his name is Ian and his thesis was more specifically about animal assisted therapy, exactly what the Doods do.

On a totally different note, a belated happy birthday to Stanley who turned five in May and to Henry who turned two.

ELBEE Belated? Seriously?

A Cautionary “Foxtale”

This spring, following all of the unusual rain, the Santa Monica mountains are spectacular. The bush sunflowers, the caterpillar phacelia, the sage and the mustard are carpeting the hills in vibrant colors.

ELBEE Is the mustard taller this year or is she getting shorter?

The mountains are truly my happy place, especially in bloom, but lately I have refrained from taking the dogs up there. Along with the flowers have come rattlesnakes, poison oak and foxtails, a seemingly innocuous plant that can cause so many problems.

Despite an abundance of caution and sticking to local streets, Stanley had a recent run in with a foxtail. It started with him licking his paw non-stop and ended with a visit to the vet.

After two hours of waiting with Stanley as a walk in, I had to leave him there so they could resolve the problem. After some probing and a light sedative to ease the pain, they found the offending foxtail.

I had a real pang of dog mom guilt when they handed it to me in a small bottle. I don’t know how I missed it, especially since Stanley is very dramatic and throws himself on the sidewalk when something is bothering him.

STANLEY How else am I going to tell her.

Even worse, he came home wearing one of those huge E-collars that look so uncomfortable and have them bumping into everything. Gus was very sympathetic. Henry, on the other hand, took one look at it, bolted across the room, and stared at Stanley from a safe distance.

Fortunately, in the closet where I keep all things dog-related, I had a Zen collar for Stanley. It’s cloth, much softer and more wearable than those hard plastic versions. As a matter of fact, Stanley looked so relaxed that I decided to join him.

ELBEE Oy!

Seriously, keep an eye out when you’re walking your dogs. Those foxtails are a menace hiding in plain sight.