dogs – Page 18 – Me and the Doods.com

An Unexpected Gift of Kindness

ELBEE Didn’t she rip off the title of this post from Honda? Can they sue her?

CHARLEY I don’t think so.

I had an encounter recently that definitely could have gone the wrong way. Instead, thanks to someone having an honest outlook and owning her behavior, it took a direct turn into the positive.

ELBEE Let me point out that it was a stranger with the good attitude.

There’s a picturesque residential street in the San Fernando Valley that’s become a popular walking area. It’s surrounded by the Santa Monica mountains with trailheads leading up from the side. There are beautiful gated homes and amazing views. It’s also a gradual uphill for about a mile so it’s a good work out.

The Doods and I were just beginning our walk in a particularly busy area near the bottom. Suddenly a white car came speeding down the hill and blew through the stop sign right next to us. Startled, I waved for them to slow down.

ELBEE That was not a wave!

To my surprise, the car came to a sudden halt. When the driver leaned over and rolled down the passenger window, I was expecting the worst. Instead, the female driver said, “I’m so sorry.” She confessed that she had been in a hurry and not paying attention to how she was driving. She felt particularly bad because I had two dogs with me. She even said “And there are three of you.” She thanked me for calling it to her attention. Then, she looked me right in the eye and added, “I appreciate you.” I immediately responded, “I appreciate you too.”

And I truly did. Not the stop sign part but the way she responded to the whole situation. In the times we’re living in, civility is often forgotten. We could have been part of a road rage incident. It could have been in the paper and they would have given my age.

ELBEE There’s her main concern.

Instead, a stranger made a mistake, graciously apologized and taught me a lesson about human kindness. In this new year, that was a special gift.

My Gratitude List (In No Particular Order)

For many years, the mountains have been my spiritual, creative space, my sanctuary. Recently, climbing up a steep trail on a magnificent winter morning, I was overwhelmed with a sense of pure gratitude. When I reached the top, the spectacular ocean views took my breath away.

ELBEE The steep climb may have been what took her breath away. She’s no spring chicken.

The view, and also some guilt, inspired me to write this post. On Thanksgiving, during the five minutes that we sit around the table before total chaos erupts, my granddaughter Samantha likes us to share what we’re grateful for. Being put on the spot, I’m incapable of expressing my gratitude and instead end up laughing hysterically.

Two of my thank you’s are bittersweet. The first is to Riley our loving, beautiful Golden who left us last year. He was the voice of reason in a house full of Doodles.

The second is to Elbee, yes Elbee, who also left us last year. Character that he was, he did such incredible work. He also inspired my voice with his. Which reminds me, I think I’ve found his spirit animal.

ELBEE I am truly touched.

It’s a raven that follows over head when I’m hiking alone and never shuts up.

ELBEE I take it back.

To all my Doods, thank you for guiding me on this therapy dog journey which is now in its fourteenth year. Charley, you trained me. Elbee you challenged me.

Gus you are a bundle of sweetness. When your first family had to find you a new home, the mom said to me, “I want you to give him a good life.” You have made my life better.

Stanley you are a lovable goof who is growing into the job. You often surprise me…usually in a good way.

I am grateful for the friendships in my life. Thank you to my long time friends whom I may not see often but who are always there for me. Thank you to the friends I see more frequently for your support and understanding. You keep this insecure writer going. Thank you to my mountain buddies. I may not know your names, but I treasure the camaraderie when we meet on the trails.

I want to include a special note of appreciation to the nurses, doctors, therapists, and other hospital staff. Many of you go as far back as Charley. You have taught me so much about kindness, compassion and healing.

Last, but absolutely not least, thank you to my wonderful family for laughing at me and for making me laugh. You are my joy, my heart, my lifeblood. I love you more than words can express.

ELBEE Hey, last is still last.

HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM ME AND THE DOODS!

A Christmas Gift Exchange

Donna, my Yom Kippur co-conspirator, and I have made it a tradition to go into UCLA Medical Center on Christmas Day. When people see her two Bichons, Tommy and Finley, and their “cousin” Gus, the joy and relief are almost palpable.

We did the majority of our visits in the Pediatric ICU, one of Donna’s regular units. To say the staff was excited to see us would be an understatement. I can only imagine how difficult it is to be working in the hospital on Christmas, especially with critically ill children.

The nurses kept thanking us for being there. Watching them laughing, hugging the dogs and taking pictures I wanted to say thank you to them. After a few minutes, we started down the hall to cheer up the patients.

A fourteen year old girl with cancer, whom I believe had lost most of her hair to chemo, was sitting up in bed. As soon as Tommy and Finley settled around her, a smile crept onto her face. Then it was Gus’s turn. The smile grew even bigger, as she buried her hand in his hair. Despite being very ill and needing help to pet the dogs, she shared her happiness with us.

During another visit, as the patient, a little girl who badly wanted a dog, was loving on Tommy and Finley, her spirited older brother was trying to get Gus to dance. The hospital is a tough place for siblings.

Some of the special encounters took place from the hall. We were told that a toddler sitting up in a crib loved dogs but she was in isolation so we couldn’t go into her room. When we brought the three dogs to the doorway and had Gus do a trick or two, we heard baby excitement.

One child was neutropenic so again we had to visit from the doorway. It was hard to gauge the response, but as we started to walk away, Donna saw a small hand reach out.

In the lobby we ran into a man pushing his son in a wheelchair. A few weeks prior when Donna had visited, the boy hadn’t been able to pet Tommy and Finley. Christmas was a different story. As we held the dogs up for him to touch we were gifted with two big grins, one from the patient and one from his dad.

All in all, the morning was a priceless gift exchange. The dogs, wrapped in their Christmas bows, brought so much unconditional love and comfort to the hospital. In return, the special moments and small miracles that we were privileged to witness were precious presents for me and Donna.

Doodles Are Different

This week once again, but sadly without Elbee, Gus joined the holiday festivities at Providence Tarzana Medical Center.

ELBEE I was there in “spirit.”

As part of the Adopt a Family program, the hospital staff helps less fortunate people fill their wish lists. Representatives from One Generation and Reseda High School were on hand to collect the gifts for distribution.

Coincidentally, I worked at Reseda High for several years as the fitness trainer for the Police Academy Magnet Program. Running into people from the school brought back so many memories.

ELBEE At least it’s not one of her infamous bodybuilding photos. That would have been so tacky in this context.

After the gifts were loaded up for delivery, Gus and I met none other than Santa.

ELBEE Why does it look like she’s in prison with Santa?

We headed up to Pediatrics where we were joined by Tahoe, the sweetest Golden Retriever, another therapy dog at the hospital. Gus and Tahoe, both wearing Christmas antlers, seemed to commiserate with each other. The look on Tahoe’s face says it all

The dogs accompanied Santa from room to room as he handed out toys. The mood quickly shifted from sadness to joy. Knowing how difficult it is to have a child in the hospital, especially at Christmas, the smiles from the young patients and their parents were the most priceless gifts.

As we walked through the halls, Staci, Tahoe’s person, confirmed something that I’ve suspected for years. Staci and her daughter have trained service dogs, including a Black Lab, a German Shepherd and a Great Dane. Currently training her first Golden Doodle, she totally agreed that Doodles are a whole different story.

For one thing, they’re very agile and can counter surf like pros. Nothing is safe. Friendly as her other dogs were, when they put on their working vests, they focused. The Doodle still wants to visit everyone she sees. Staci’s other trainees developed a certain independence. The Doodle sticks like glue. I was so happy because her stories validated every crazy thing the Doods have done. It wasn’t my fault. It was theirs.

ELBEE Seriously?

I shared a Stanley story with her that sums it up. In the kitchen we have a black throw rug by the sink plus two smaller rugs where the dogs eat. Stanley constantly takes the black rug and drops it in the living room. He takes the other two and deposits them in the family room or the yard. He doesn’t sit on them, destroy them or play with them. He simply deposits them.

Even stranger, this morning I couldn’t find “his” rug, forgetting that I had put it in the wash. When I had the nerve to set his bowl on the floor, he started barking and refused to eat. He wouldn’t touch his breakfast until I retrieved his rug from the dryer. Not even Elbee was that eccentric.

ELBEE Excuse me?

Caroling and Comforting

Last Sunday was the annual People Animal Connection caroling event at UCLA Medical Center. Gus worked at the California Science Center on Saturday and was exhausted so against my better judgment I brought Stanley.

Not only was it another new situation for him but with about 20 teams plus other people joining us, it was a lot to take in. When he saw all of the dogs, I could swear he went “woo hoo.”

STANLEY Excuse me I do not “woo hoo” although I admit that I was very excited.

After awhile, although still excited, he settled in. To my surprise he even kept on the holiday coat and the fuzzy antlers that Charley had worn.

CHARLEY I was quite touched to see that.

As in past years, thank goodness, we were joined by two student acapella groups because our singing has really not improved. I know that I should lip synch but they sound so beautiful that sometimes I get carried away and start singing out loud.

ELBEE Poor Stanley was wondering what that weird noise was he kept hearing.

As we walked through the halls with the dogs decked out in holiday apparel, faces lit up around us. Often a patient or a nurse would wave a team into a room. Stanley and I stopped in to see an older man who was lying in his bed and had been asking for a visit.

The patient quietly shared that he was having a difficult time because he had recently lost two dogs within weeks of each other. To my surprise Stanley gently kissed him on the cheek as if he sensed the patient needed a little extra TLC.

A short time later we ran into a man and a woman in the hallway who were crying inconsolably. I didn’t want to disturb them but when the woman glanced at Stanley, I asked her if she’d like a moment with him. She said he had come at the perfect time and dropped down on the floor, petting and hugging him. The man never looked up but when we were walking away, he murmured “thank you.” Several people, including a nurse, had tears in their eyes.

It was a reminder of where we were and why we were all there. The ancient Christmas carol, God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, first published in 1833, is a song about comfort and joy. Of course we were there to bring holiday joy, but every one of the PAC dogs who made someone smile that morning or helped someone with pain or sadness was truly bringing holiday comfort.

ELBEE I am really sorry to break the mood but someone has obviously been googling Christmas carols.

“De-stressing” with Stanley

**Stanley and Logan, Stress Busters Extraordinaire**

This week, Stanley and some of his canine colleagues from the People Animal Connection, visited Powell Library at UCLA to help the students deal with the stress of final exams. Gus is a pro at it but this was Stanley’s first time.

When he works an event that is new for him, I never know exactly what to expect. To my surprise, he was on such good behavior, it was hard to believe that he was the same dog who had caused all the chaos on Thanksgiving. He charmed everyone, students and faculty alike.

ELBEE The kid was good. I was very proud.

STANLEY As for Thanksgiving, I’m innocent. It was the grandson’s fault.

His love of attention, which can make him seem a little pushy, especially if he’s competing with Gus, was a complete asset in the library. When we first walked in, he showed some interest in the other dogs, but once the kids gathered around him, it was all over. He had a captive audience.

I could almost see it in his eyes as he figured it out. He cuddled. He happily accepted hugs. He put his head on available laps. He did his tricks like a pro. When he sprawled out for a belly rub it brought out the inevitable laughter. So many times I heard, as I often do, “He’s so funny.” Since that’s not your average dog compliment, it made me wonder, had he inherited it from his namesake?

My late brother Stan, a television director for many years at KTVU in San Francisco, had a gift for getting people to relax. When a celebrity would arrive at the studio either stressed out or stressing everyone else out, Stan had a trick for turning the situation around.

An expert at tv and movie trivia, he’d remember one of the very first shows they’d ever done, and would probably much rather forget, and tell them how much he’d enjoyed it. His demeanor was so lovable and friendly that they’d inevitably end up laughing.

He did magic as a hobby but his humor and the way he put people at ease was magic unto itself. How special if that magic lives on in Stanley. I couldn’t ask for a more beautiful gift of the season. Thank you Stanleys past and present.

Chaos in the Conversation Pit

This year we had our usual non-Norman Rockwell Thanksgiving. Instead of lingering around a beautifully set table, here we are hanging out in the conversation pit with hundreds of Lego pieces and who knows what else on the floor.

There is a common thread that runs through all of our Thanksgivings. The usual holiday chaos is amped way up with the mix of grandkids and dogs. Sadly Riley and Elbee left us this year but Gus and Stanley more than did their part. They are Doodles and Doodles do not like to be ignored.

Ten year old Samantha actually has no problem with them. Her fifteen year old brother Ryan has a teen attitude so whatever. Six year old Bella has made incredible progress. She and her little brother Ryder came to terms with Gus some time ago because he’s small and cute. Stanley, being extra large, at first sent them both running. Then, I’m not sure how it happened (neither is she) but Bella almost started to like him.

Ryder, not so much. I think his perspective is like the perspective in this photo where Stanley’s head looks immense. Stanley, sensing Ryder’s energy and attitude, went on a totally unsuccessful campaign of jumping and high pitched barking to win him over.

We finally put him in the yard for awhile so we could all have a break.

ELBEE That is just sad.

STANLEY May I remind you, I’m still a kid. I was so hurt I tried to get Robert the mailman to take me with him.

To show you how little progress was made, when they were leaving, Ryder announced that he had nicknames for the dogs. Gus was “Cloud” and Stanley was “Pain in the Butt.”

CHARLEY Sorry to say, she does not make this stuff up.

One other thing happened that was kind of the icing on the Thanksgiving cake or the gravy on the turkey.

ELBEE Please tell me she didn’t just say that.

Freshly bathed, Gus and Stanley were, of course, hanging around the kitchen when the husband was carving the turkey. For some reason the knife made a hole in the pan and juice started pouring off of the cutting board, showering the dogs.

ELBEE Maybe it was because she was using one of those cheap disposable pans.

Despite trying to wash them off, they still smell awful and I’m becoming a vegan.

November 23rd

November 23rd is a very important date.

CHARLEY I pride myself on being quite the history buff but that doesn’t ring any bells.

This year it was the fourth anniversary of Gus passing his Pet Partners test with a perfect score, the first step in his therapy dog journey. That meant so much to me because the family who had to rehome him as a puppy simply asked me to give him a good life.

It was also Stanley’s year and a half birthday.

ELBEE Excuse me. His half birthday?

It’s hard to believe he was that little puppy who fell asleep in my lap the first day I met him.

Not only is he physically large, but he has developed a huge personality. Stanley does drama. If he gets a leaf or heaven forbid a twig on his paw when we’re walking, he throws himself down on the sidewalk.

ELBEE He’s a regular Sarah Bernhardt.

I know you must be thinking that I have an incredible memory to recall the dates of these events.

ELBEE Oh yes, that’s just what we were thinking.

The real reason November 23rd means so much to me is because it’s my grandson Ryder’s birthday. I was driving to Gus’s testing at UCLA when I got the exciting news that Ryder had arrived.

CHARLEY I believe what she just did is called burying the lead.

ELBEE And she’s still desperately hoping for grandma influencer? I have a better chance of getting sainthood.

Ryder was born with Hirschsprung’s disease, a complicated illness that in simple terms causes severe intestinal dysfunction. He has been in and out of the hospital so many times that I’ve lost count. But what a little fighter!

Danielle and her husband Jay, whom we adore despite his being a cat person, have fought for him every step of the way. Through every difficult moment they have offered love and strength. With endless determination, they have found him the best medical care. At only six years old, his big sister Bella has developed true compassion.

Despite still having some health issues to deal with, Ryder has come so far. His birthday party was a true celebration of his turning four. More importantly, it was a celebration of his resilience, his energy, his joy. He’s in constant motion, talks non-stop and is into everything. In short, he’s just what a four year old boy should be. As a bonus, he’s also funny.

ELBEE I’m sure she thinks he gets that from her side of the family.

The Mountains, Browned Out but Still Colorful

Thanks to the wild fires and the change of seasons, the profusion of flowers that painted the mountains such vibrant colors is now gone. Except for the lemonade berry, the toyon and a few other trees, everything is more muted. The caterpillar phacelia, once a beautiful lavender, is now grey. The buckwheat has turned from pink to rust.

ELBEE Someone is showing off her limited knowledge of plants.

Still there are a lot of colorful things happening. Nothing like the naked hiker I saw a few years ago, but enough to keep it interesting. I’ve seen two rattlers lately, a gopher snake the length of a garden hose and a horned toad, very cute in a miniature dinosaur kind of way.

CHARLEY She used to scream and take off like an Olympian at the sight of a snake. Now she’s photographing them. I’m quite proud

On a trail near my house, I saw an ornate handled knife stuck in the ground. The word “help” had been etched into the dirt around it. It was very disturbing but there was no one in the area and there were no signs of foul play. A day later it was gone.

In stark contrast, this graffiti was on a nearby wall.

CHARLEY Now that’s ironic.

And talk about disturbing, a much older man on a bike rode by with his bike shorts so low that his butt crack was showing.

CHARLEY & ELBEE Unfortunately we saw it too and won’t be able to unsee it for eternity.

Something on the news a few weeks ago made me think that I could become one of the more intriguing people in the mountains. A woman with a beautiful voice was singing in the subway. A policeman shot a video of her and it went viral, leading to all kinds of opportunities.

ELBEE I’m afraid to see where this is going.

I sometimes sing to keep myself going when I’m heading up a steep trail. What if a ranger videotaped me and it went viral?

ELBEE Two problems immediately come to mind. She’s tone deaf and only knows about three songs.

I’d be the singing grandma of the mountains. I’d get so much mileage out of it that I’d reach my dream of becoming an influencer, a hiking influencer, even if I’m still not exactly sure what an influencer is.

ELBEE The only thing she’d influence people to do is to stop hiking. And I think the daughters need to get her one of those senior alert bracelets.

Gus Is a Party

Gus loves a party and the Mattel Children’s Hospital Party on the Pier in Santa Monica was no exception. From the moment he got out of the car, he pranced through the parking lot as if he was the guest of honor.

UCLA People Animal Connection had an area on the pier where people could stop by to meet the dogs. Charley’s photo in the top row of our poster was a bittersweet reminder of past parties.

A few of us decided to mingle and headed down to the main area of the event which was like walking into chaos. There were rides, games, live music, photo booths and a huge dining tent where the food was catered by Wolfgang Puck! Not that I don’t love a good taco stand, but Wolfgang Puck!

ELBEE Suddenly she’s a foodie. Who knew?

Passing the popular Barbie celebrity booth, I was very excited when the photographer suggested that Gus join the celebrities for a picture.

ELBEE She had to ask her granddaughter who they were.

Gus had an up close and personal with the Dodger mascot, who, I later learned, is not really a mascot. Gus is a Dodger fan by proxy and has taken photos with the great big cartoon character at Pups in the Park, but has never looked him in the eye.

ELBEE And probably never will again if he can help it.

In the midst of all the activity, as so often happens, we had some special encounters. A woman approached with her teenage daughter, who had cerebral palsy. The girl loves animals and responded so well to Gus that the mom and I fell into an earnest conversation about how a dog might be really beneficial for her.

A woman at a table in the large food tent waved us over. Her teenage son, who was sitting next to her in a wheel chair, was severely challenged. Incredibly positive and upbeat, she said that he had been in and out of UCLA several times and loved the PAC visits.

I lifted Gus up so that she could put her son’s hand on him. I couldn’t see any response but his mom assured me that he was enjoying the interaction. After a few minutes as I moved to put Gus down, to my shock, the boy’s hand, slightly but surely, reached out for him.

At the mom’s request, I picked Gus up again and put him closer to her son’s face. As Gus gently kissed his cheek, I saw the slightest trace of a smile. In an afternoon of celebration, the movement of his hand and the joy on his face were what I celebrated the most.