UCLA – Page 9 – Me and the Doods.com

Drag Queens and Dodgers and Dogs, Oh My!

If I were to ask you to guess what the Doods and I did last Sunday afternoon and you said drag queen bingo, you’d be right!

The UCLA People Animal Connection holds an annual volunteer appreciation luncheon. With COVID-19 making that impossible this year, they held a virtual volunteer appreciation bingo brunch.

I have to admit when I first scanned the email, I wasn’t too excited. I’m really not much of a bingo fan.

ELBEE Hate so say it but she’s right. Bingo can be sort of a snooze.

Then I reread it and saw that it was going to feature Charlie Hides, drag queen extraordinaire as the caller. Now that was a whole different story.

I logged in on bingo day and there she was in all of her cotton candy hair and fabulous make-up glory. She was pure energy and fun.

As a plus, she’s a dog lover and a true believer in pet therapy. She was as delighted with our group as we were with her.

We didn’t just play bingo we did classic dances. We laughed at her constant banter as we joined in on head, shoulders, knees and toes, the chicken dance and YMCA. Gus and Stanley were right there dancing along with me.

ELBEE Classic dances?

Out of curiosity, I asked if she’d ever been on RuPaul’s Drag Race. I’m a huge fan. Not only was Charlie on the show but she was the oldest contestant ever. We were stunned when she shared that she was over fifty!

ELBEE Her skin was amazing.

As if that wasn’t great enough for the week, the Doods had a major Dodger moment. Fans haven’t been allowed in the stadiums during this season of the pandemic, so cardboard cutouts are taking their place. Cutouts of Gus, Stanley and some of their PAC buddies are now gracing the stands at Dodger Stadium.

As someone who once told Dodger manager Dave Roberts that I was a “granny groupie,” I was thrilled. The baseball season has been shortened but I am grateful for every game I’ve watched, especially the winning ones.

Seeing cardboard Gus and Stanley sitting in the stands is crazy. It’s definitely a far cry from pups in the park when you can bring your real dog to a game. Still, they are there in spirit representing all of us at UCLA Health.

During this challenging year of illness, isolation and discord, we need to celebrate the positive whenever it’s possible. Whether it’s a fabulous drag queen bringing us together in laughter or our favorite baseball team winning the division, those moments are gifts in this most difficult of times.

ELBEE RuPaul and the Dodgers? Someone has very eclectic taste.

We Will Always Remember You

Yom Kippur is a biggie in the Jewish religion, the holiest day of the year. It’s a day of atonement, reflection and remembrance. Observant people fast and spend most of the day in temple.

ELBEE Notice she said “observant.”

I guess I’m kind of a Yom Kippur rebel. In the past, along with Donna, my fellow rebel, I have been known to break some of the rules. On two or three occasions, we took the dogs into the hospital on the holiday. We figured the good works that they were doing made up for any of our non-observance.

This year COVID-19 let me off the hook. I wasn’t going to sit in a crowded service, inside or out. My cousin emailed me a link to on-line services in Florida but with my ADD, sitting and watching the computer was not going to happen.

ELBEE There are so many things wrong with that paragraph. Someone is going to have a lot of atoning to do.

Instead, early in the morning, I hiked up into the mountains.

ELBEE I’m not sure if that’s kosher.

Sitting on one of my favorite overlooks with a view of the ocean in the distance, I felt a true sense of spiritual connection. The morning was unusually quiet, there were no other people around. The little birds who have been very vocal lately, were still. Two large hawks soared silently overhead.

As I sat there, remembrance washed over me. This year with so many deaths from the virus, it was especially poignant.

Of all the treasured people in my life whom I’ve lost, including my parents, dear friends and relatives, two are always an integral part of the holiday…my brother Stan and my friend Eileen.

They both brought love, laughter and kindness to my life. Although, they’ve each been gone many years and were way too young when they passed, not a day goes by that I don’t feel their presence

Since their ashes are in the ocean, Eileen’s kids and I have made it a holiday tradition to place flowers in the sand for them. Yizkor is a remembrance service on Yom Kippur, a prayer for the deceased. This is our way of saying Yizkor.

Her boys Mark and Gary and I headed to our special beach. Her daughter Lisa was with her family, but joined us in spirit on our annual “pilgrimage.” We walked down the sand and found a place to sit on the rocks.

We talked softly, shared memories and stood flowers in the sand as the waves broke on the shore. Our sense of connection with each other and with Stan and Eileen was, as Mark said, “magical.”

I don’t think there is a better way to celebrate Yom Kippur than opening our hearts with unconditional love for those who are gone and for those who are a cherished part of our lives today.

When I got home in the evening, I lit candles of remembrance. Gus and Stanley, sensing my emotions, sat by my side.

A Shout Out to UCLA

Someone recently shared the photo on the left with me. Since it made me laugh I wanted to pass it along. Laughter is in such short supply right now. And did you actually think I could let this go by without picking up Stanley, which, by the way, was a little more difficult than bench pressing him.

CHARLEY That’s two weeks in a row she’s started her post with a poop joke. I’m concerned.

On a positive note, I want to give a shout out to everyone at UCLA Medical Center. They have gradually found ways to bring the dog presence back into the hospital.

Little did I know that when I brought Gus to UCLA on March 11th for his Pet Partners testing, it would be our last time there for several months. Shortly after, as COVID-19 took over, the dog visits were stopped. Sadly, it was just when they were needed the most,

Missing our visits and frustrated that we couldn’t help, I was delighted when we were asked to send in photos or videos of the dogs thanking nurses and then other hospital staff on the front lines. These signs are truly from the heart.

Virtual visits came next. As I’ve shared, I really wanted to be a part of them but was totally overwhelmed by the technology. I was so excited when I successfully downloaded (or is it uploaded) Zoom.

ELBEE Oy!

Since the initial visits, the PAC dogs and Blue Moon, the miniature horse, have developed a huge virtual presence in the hospital. They’ve visited with patients, staff, families and students. Whenever there’s a request, the teams show up. Their cardboard cutouts are now part of the decor.

Last week, right before our “meeting” with the kids in the neuropsych units followed by a special patient request, I had technical difficulties. I’ve had them before

ELBEE Many times

but this was major. My router had died. I had no internet connection. It wasn’t a quick fix so I had to cancel at the last minute. There was a part of me that felt terrible about letting everyone down.

Then I realized that in a selfish way, I was going to miss the visits for myself. It made me think of a quote that I saw recently. “Life is better when you are happy. Life is best when other people are happy because of you.”

I would change the word “you” to “dogs.” I couldn’t do any of this without Gus and Stanley. Their antics are what entertain. They see the laptop on the floor and know it’s their time to shine. When a sick child watches wide-eyed as Gus dances or Stanley spins, that moment is purely about their connection with the dogs. That moment is a priceless gift.

Thank You Teachers

When I’m not working out at home, squatting with Gus and bench pressing Stanley, I spend a lot of time walking with them. With the heat, the snakes and the foxtails, the trails are pretty much off limits so we’ve been cruising the neighborhood.

I’m fascinated by what people share because their signs are often a reflection of the times. The pandemic has definitely had an effect. One homeowner, obviously fed up with so many more people walking their dogs by his house, informed everyone that the poop fairy didn’t live on his lawn or in his trashcan.

Being home so much more seems to have brought out hidden creativity. This sign next to a mailbox and the figures on the lawn made me laugh. It was all I could do not to dance.

Gus and Stanley She danced and it was embarrassing.

With this crazy new school year beginning, it struck me how many signs are still up honoring the class of 2020. So many people, including the daughters, are trying to figure it out for their kids. It’s also a huge challenge for the teachers, whether in real or virtual classrooms.

With all of that in mind, I was drawn to a mural on our local elementary school. I’ve walked by it so many times over the years but never really paid much attention. It was just a bright, colorful drawing on the side of the building.

Now with the play yard strangely silent and the parking lots empty, I stopped to read the words and thought about the message. As I posed Gus and Stanley, it suddenly struck me that it also applied to our canine teachers.

During the past few difficult months so many of our dogs have been working overtime. They’ve been great listeners. They haven’t judged or interrupted. We may not have gone to lunch or out shopping but they have truly been best friends.

As far as motivation goes, they were the ones who got me out there walking in the first place. They have helped me through so many rough COVID-19 moments simply by sitting quietly at my side. They have taught me the beauty of unconditional love and acceptance. They have helped me cope.

When I became part of the People Animal Connection in 2006, Jack Barron was my amazing human mentor and advisor. Charley, my first Golden Doodle was my first dog mentor.

Charley may not have had the experience but when he stepped gently onto the bed of a woman waiting for a heart transplant and cuddled up next to her, he filled me with wonder. Since that day, Elbee, and now Gus and Stanley, have shown me the way.

The mural is a thank you to teachers everywhere. Let’s hope when we see the messages for the class of 2021, that they they will be positive ones.

A Triple Header

ELBEE For the record, the last baseball triple header was in 1920!

Recently, with my growing Zoom expertise, I was excited to have Gus and Stanley do a virtual visit for some of the UCLA nurses. I confidently signed in and then it happened. I couldn’t unmute the sound. The nurses were very kind and acted as if they were happy just to see Gus and Stanley but I was embarrassed.

ELBEE It was an epic fail.

Very concerned because I had three meetings scheduled for this past Wednesday, I turned to my tech support team.

ELBEE That would be the youngest daughter, her four old and and her seven year old.

They did some trouble shooting and went so far as to set up a test Zoom conference. It seemed like things were back on track but I was still nervous signing in for our first Wednesday visit, the kids in the UCLA neuropsych units.

Sure enough, I logged in early and my computer started acting up again. Fortunately, Jen from the People Animal Connection helped me though it. By the time the kids joined us, I was talking loud and clear. The kids are so honest, I can only imagine if there were glitches. For instance, one little boy immediately wanted to know why Stanley’s beard was brown.

ELBEE I had the same issue when I drank water.

Our second meeting was with the Mattel Ambassadors Program, a wonderful group of about 50 teens interested in going into medicine. Three PAC teams plus some of the staff were there to talk to the kids about the work of the hospital therapy dogs. I was thrilled when it was my turn and they could actually hear me.

The third meeting was “yappy” hour. All of the PAC members (including dogs) are invited to a virtual cocktail party with drink of choice. It’s a great way to reach out while social distancing. It’s reassuring to know that we’re all is this together. None of us have been able to bring our dogs into the hospital since March. Just one more challenge in this time of challenges.

What better way to end this triple header of a day than with a Dodger game. It’s a crazy, shortened COVID-19 season, but it’s still a season. There are no fans in the stands, but for fans like me, watching the games on tv and hearing the reassuring banter of Orel Hershiser and Joe Davis brings a kind of normalcy. As a bonus, that night, the Dodgers beat the San Diego Padres 7-6.

The next morning, coincidentally, Vin Scully, long time announcer and one of my personal idols, was doing a spot on the radio. When he ended with his classic, “It’s time for Dodger baseball,” it bought a huge smile to my face.

Say “Cheese”

Considering the times we’re living in, last Wednesday seemed like it was going to be a relatively normal day. For the first time since March, Gus, Stanley and I were heading into UCLA Medical Center instead of visiting virtually.

With COVID-19 precautions in mind, the People Animal Connection was holding its annual photo shoot for the 2021 calendar. It was being held outside. We were all asked to wear masks and socially distance.

The theme for the calendar was movies. The Dog Father. When Hairy Met Sally. There would be costumes involved. How could this get any better?

ELBEE I have to agree. Costumes are always a plus.

Excited, I loaded the dogs into the car. As soon as I got on the freeway, I was reminded that things were not the same. Where was the L.A. traffic? About 25 minutes later we pulled up in front of the hospital, a drive that, on a typical day, can take well over an hour.

I parked at valet, which is no longer valet, and walked a short distance to where the shoot was taking place. It felt comfortable to be back, even though we couldn’t go inside the hospital. I think the dogs were confused. People were delighted to see them but couldn’t pet them.

GUS & STANLEY Was it something we said?

When it was our turn, the glam squad (Jen and Erin) and yes, stage mom, got the dogs ready for their first photo, Man’s Best Friend’s Wedding. The tux fit Stanley so it fell to Gus to be the bride.

ELBEE The little guy looked fabulous. Could Ru Paul’s “Dog” Race be next?”

GUS I hate to say it but I did look good and was surprisingly comfortable.

Their next shot was for The Woof of Wall Street.

GUS I don’t like to complain but Stanley got the cool wolf costume and I got a toupee and glasses. I need an agent.

It was a slightly chaotic day getting Gus, Stanley and all of the other dogs to wear silly costumes and pose. Still, it was a special day. Juliane, the photographer, has been taking pictures of the PAC dogs for years, as far back as Charley and Elbee. It was reassuring to see her familiar face behind the camera.

More than that, thanks to the dogs, there was laughter and joy. For a short time it was a break from the worry, concern and weight of the virus. How fitting that the photo shoot took place in the UCLA Medical Center Garden of Peace.

Virtual Trial and Error

Over the past few challenging COVID-19 months, doing virtual visits with the kids in the UCLA neuropsych units has been a real learning experience. It’s been a challenging process of trial and error.

During our in person visits, as soon the dogs arrive, the excitement level goes up. The hospital setting fades away as the kids dance with Gus or give Stanley a belly rub when he sprawls on the floor. I’ll even catch kids who claim they’re not interested, sneaking a peak or smiling at a trick.

The virtual visits are kind of like those television shows that are taping remotely without audiences. Without the physical presence of the dogs, it takes a lot more to get the patients engaged and keep them involved.

One morning, with a little luck, it all came together and I saw what was possible. The dogs were relaxing after our walk so I had the younger kids yell, “Wake up Gus and Stanley.” That immediately got their attention…the dogs and the kids.

Gus, having a painful skin issue, was wearing a “cone of shame.” When the kids saw it they instantly commiserated with him. It was touching to see how they forgot their own problems while they were worrying about his.

ELBEE He was milking it for all it was worth.

When I put Stanley in a hat and glasses, it drew a lot of giggling. One boy couldn’t believe that Stanley would wear the glasses. Another suggested I dress him up like Sherlock Holmes.

In the teen unit they were very involved playing cards so I knew the dogs were going to be a tough sell. Then I noticed two of the boys playing chess. Genuinely curious and impressed, I asked where they’d learned.

One of them said that his father and his uncle had taught him when he was very young. I was fascinated when he shared that he’d earned a chess merit badge when he was in the cub scouts. Who knew?

ELBEE I was a grand master in my day. I tried to teach Gus and Stanley when I was still there, but they got stuck at checkers.

The easy conversation led him and the others to ask about the dogs. They commented on Stanley’s size so I let him stand and put his paws on my shoulders. That brought a lot of laughter.

Not for a second did I take their involvement for granted. I was so grateful to see the enjoyment in their facial expressions and body language. I was also grateful that during this pandemic, the therapists at UCLA have found a way for us to keep sharing the magic of the dogs, even virtually. There are some days when it works and others when it doesn’t but the moments of connection are priceless.

A Belated Happy Fourth

Yes, I know that the Fourth of July was last week. I checked my trusty calendar and began a post that would have been more timely.

ELBEE She still has one of those paper calendars. You know that expression about old dogs and new tricks. I’ve always found that a little offensive but in this case it fits.

Then I got distracted by Gus’s fabulous In Touch magazine appearance as the doppelgänger of Brian May from Queen.

ELBEE I knew she’d find a way to bring that up again.

In the past, I’ve written about memorable Fourth of Julys. Some were celebratory. Some were beautifully traditional. Some were emotional. None were like this year.

When the daughters were little, there were homemade picnics, fireworks, skydivers and patriotic sing-alongs at the local junior college.

ELBEE Hello! Colonel Sanders is not homemade unless the Colonel is living at your house.

Ben Affleck in Pink Tee with Gus — **Ben Affleck (in purple tee) with** **Gus**

As part of the People Animal Connection at UCLA, the Doods and I have taken part in festive parades down Sunset Boulevard in Pacific Palisades. One year, caught up in the excitement, I didn’t even realize that Gus was walking with Ben Affleck.

For some reason 2017 was a special holiday. There was an amazing atmosphere at the parade. People seemed truly happy to be uniting in appreciation of America, celebrating our history and our freedom. There was a pervasive sense of patriotism, a sense that people wanted to reach out and connect with one another.

2018 was the most personally meaningful Fourth that I’ve ever experienced. At the time, my dear friend Roberta, who has now passed, was bravely battling a brain tumor. An inspiration in my life, she loved the dogs and found comfort in their presence. We went to her house and did a parade just for her.

As for this year I’m almost speechless.

ELBEE So am I.

How do you celebrate our nation’s birthday in the midst of a pandemic? Parks and beaches were closed. With social distancing, parades and picnics were impossible. Local firework displays were cancelled except, apparently, for the illegal ones that began weeks before. I don’t know how that became a nationwide phenomenon.

**To my daughter Nicole on the front lines, thank you.**

As we watched fireworks on tv, many set to patriotic music, I thought about what was happening. I felt a tremendous sadness for the people who were ill or who were gone. I felt concern for all of our front line workers and first responders. I felt some fear about the future.

Underneath it all, I felt gratitude for the way that so many have come together. It’s not easy to wear masks, refrain from hugging each other or curtail normal activities but we do it. In a sign of caring, we have each others’ backs.

A special note of gratitude to Gus and Stanley. They have been there for me and the husband. They have given us comfort, made us laugh and provided unconditional love. Never have we felt luckier to have our own personal, hard working therapy dogs.

I Read It in a Magazine

I was all set to write about this Fourth of July which may be one of the craziest ones in history. It even tops the time I heard Pat Boone singing heavy metal music at a local celebration. He was in a phase. It was painful. Then, this morning, I went to the market and had a total change of heart.

ELBEE That makes no sense at all.

I’ll explain. Last month, I shared about a teleconference that the Doods and I did with the UCLA history department. (It’s a Virtual World) Everyone was so enthusiastic about meeting the dogs, even virtually. What was interesting was that at least three people, upon seeing Gus for the first time, mentioned that he looked like Brian May from Queen. I had never thought about it but they were right.

Coincidentally, a few days later, reading In Touch at the check out stand, I noticed a feature called “Double Creature.”

ELBEE Why do people always say they’re reading those magazines at the check out? She bought it.

They asked, “Does your pet look like a celebrity?” It was almost too easy. All I had to do was e-mail them. I immediately found a photo of Brian May, whom I love after watching Bohemian Rhapsody six times, and sent it along with a picture of Gus.

A surprisingly short time later, I received an e-mail from a woman named Jen saying how cute it was and asking if I could tell her my name.

ELBEE That is totally shocking. She didn’t include her bio or even her name.

She also wondered if Gus shared any characteristics with Brian. I told her that although Gus couldn’t sing, he was very musical. I explained that he stands on his hind legs and dances for the kids in the hospital at UCLA Medical Center where he’s a therapy dog.

When she asked if I had a larger photo or I assume one with better resolution, I figured I was in trouble. A day later she got back to me and told me not to worry. The art director thought the one on the UCLA site would work. Art director? UCLA site? That had to be a good sign. Gus was in.

That was the last I heard. I tried to forget about it but I admit, I checked an issue or two and was disappointed not to see him. This morning I bought the latest issue of In Touch but, still not having heard anything from Jen, wasn’t expecting much. I waited until I was in my car to check.

Imagine my reaction when I was leafing through the magazine and there was Gus with his doppelgänger. It was almost surreal. They had used his adorable trading card picture and even mentioned his hospital dance. It was better than fireworks.

Dogs, Dads & Dodgers

I’m a total sports nut, the kind who screams when watching a game, whether it’s on TV or in person. Years ago, when the Lakers were at their peak, I was so loud that the daughters (and the neighbors) could hear me yelling from out in the street during the games. If my team is winning, I will stay rooted to one spot, afraid I’ll jinx them if I move.

I should clarify that I’m actually a baseball and basketball fan. Other sports, like football, go right over my head.

ELBEE She’s not kidding. One time she and my brother Charley were on the field at the Rose Bowl for a special UCLA appearance. The director told her to go stand on the ten yard line. When she asked where it was, he told her that it was next to the nine yard line. That guy was funny.

The Lakers and Dodgers are my teams. I once ducked out of a fancy wedding reception at a hotel in Beverly Hills to sneak into the bar and watch the Lakers in a pivotal play-off game. Meeting Magic Johnson at a charity event is one of my prized memories. So is casually running into long time Dodgers’ announcer Vin Scully when he was out shopping with his family.

ELBEE There was absolutely nothing casual about the way she ran up to him. I think she scared the poor man.

One of my favorite perks of volunteering at UCLA with the dogs is the Laker/Dodger connection. UCLA Heath is in partnership with both teams so there are often events where we get to meet the players.

Gus and I spent a morning visiting patients with Kenta Maeda when he was a pitcher for the Dodgers. We had the chance to take photos with Brandon Ingram when he was a Laker.

ELBEE Wonder if meeting her has anything to do with the fact that they’ve both moved on to other teams. Just a thought.

Recently, I received an e-mail requesting volunteers for a Zoom Father’s Day event at Mattel Children’s Hospital called “Dogs, Dads and Dodgers.” I couldn’t sign up fast enough, figuring that virtual Dodgers would be better than no Dodgers.

ELBEE Hmm wonder where she got the title for this post.

I was so excited when I signed in for the Zoom meeting that Sunday. I expected half of the team would be on the call and that we’d all chat.

ELBEE Seriously?

I was momentarily disappointed when I saw that it was only going to be one player, Ross Stripling. Then, as he began to read to the kids, I was really touched. I mean how often do you have the privilege of, even virtually, seeing a Dodger pitcher enthusiastically reading a children’s book to kids in the hospital. On another positive note, he’s still with the Dodgers so I didn’t scare him away.