December 2020 – Me and the Doods.com

Can You Headstand?

Staying in shape during the pandemic is often difficult. The isolation and stress can lead to a real lack of motivation. To make it worse, regular fitness centers are closed. I’ve seen pilates classes in parking lots and martial arts in back alleys. Neither one screams “come join us.” Though I was a fitness instructor for many years, it’s even hard for me to push myself.

GUS & STANLEY What about the expression “Trainer, train yourself?”

CHARLEY Sorry boys but I believe the expression is “Physician, heal thyself.”

Fortunately, I have some weights at home and am still doing more pushups than the average prisoner but it’s really the call of the wild that saves me.

ELBEE Call of the wild? Marked hiking trails in the Santa Monica Mountains with ocean views

I’m very lazy about stretching. My friend Mary, on the other hand, is great about doing yoga. She can go through an hour’s worth of poses. Although I took yoga for years, when I tried a couple of classes on line, I got nauseous.

As we were talking and I was trying to find out how she gets herself to do it, a thought occurred to me. I wondered if she could still do a headstand, a point of pride among us seniors. When I asked, she matter of factly replied, “I do one every day.” The seed was planted. It had been a long time but could I still do one?

A few days later, as I was waiting for the dogs’ Zoom call with UCLA to start, I still had headstands on the brain. With my ADD, it’s hard for me to just sit and wait, so I thought what better time to try a headstand.

I texted Jen, the director of the People Animal Connection, who would be running the meeting and said “I’m trying to do a headstand.” Instead of texting back, “Are you crazy?”she replied, “I CAN do a headstand.” A few minutes later she texted that she’d just done one in the middle of her office. Fortunately, she was alone.

To my surprise, after a few, well several, tries, I made it. I was using a dresser as a security blanket but I was upside down

For some time, Jen and I have been discussing how we can make Zoom calls with the patients more interesting. We considered singing but we’re both terrible. Were we on to something with the headstands? Was AGT next? Granted she is much better and doesn’t need to use the dresser, but I’d be content to be backup headstander.

After the meeting, we were again on the topic of making our calls more engaging. I remembered Jen mentioning something about piano. When I asked if she could play, she said that she’d taken lessons as a child but now only played her kids’ tiny toy piano.

As a child, I had taken ballet lessons. Suddenly inspired, I jumped up and did a few pirouettes and port de bras. Maybe I still had it.

GUS & STANLEY We thought she was having a seizure.

What? No Singing?

As far back as my days volunteering with Charley, caroling at UCLA has been an annual tradition. Several of the People Anima Connection teams walk through the hospital, dressed in festive attire, spreading holiday cheer.

Unfortunately, in this year of the pandemic, the event was canceled. Aside from the obvious reasons, I was also selfishly sad because I’d miss the chance to sing. I may not be the greatest, but it’s so much fun to join the chorus. To be honest, most of us are more enthusiastic than musically inclined.

ELBEE In junior high she had to lip synch to be in the choir.

In the early days, a woman named Marilee, who has an absolutely beautiful voice, would lead the caroling. Almost entirely because of her, we sounded pretty good. Not until she retired and we were on our own, did we realize just how truly terrible we were.

In one of our recent Zoom “yappy hours,” someone reminded us of how painful our singing was during that first year without Marilee. One of the doctors heard us and asked why they didn’t let the dogs sing instead. After that fiasco, they added student a cappella groups so we went back to feeling like we were fabulous.

Anyone familiar with my singing knows that it’s not good but that has never stopped me. Recently with all of the Zoom visits I’ve been doing with the dogs, I began thinking how a song or two would be such a great way to grab patients’ attention and cheer them up. They like it when Gus dances or Stanley dances with me so why not add a song or two.

I mentioned it to Jen, the director of PAC and she was on the same page. We’ve done several Zoom calls together plus she monitors our virtual visits with the kids in the neuropsych units. She knows that it takes a bit of something extra to keep patients engaged. By the way, although I haven’t heard her sing, I have a feeling her voice is about the same caliber as mine.

ELBEE Trust me.

Last week during a group virtual visit, when we were taking turns introducing ourselves and our dogs, one of the volunteers broke out in a Christmas carol… in tune! Having discussed the singing idea but never having acted on it, I’m sure I can safely speak for me and Jen when I say that we were both a little jealous

This week during the virtual volunteer holiday party, they introduced a UCLA student who, inspired by her grandfather, had done some amazing charitable work. Next thing we knew, she was playing a lovely classical piece on the piano. I immediately texted Jen, “We don’t stand a chance, musically speaking.”

Wishing you safe, happy and harmonious holidays from me and the Doods. Let’s hope that next year, tone deaf or not, we’ll be back in the hospital bringing joy, love and laughter to everyone.

Put Something Good Out There

When I write, inspiration comes from so many different places. This week it was from a packet of the sweetener Truvia.

ELBEE Seriously?

The packets have positive sayings on them. It’s like a fortune cookie with your coffee. They say things like “Find Your Open Door,” or “Do It for You.” The one that said, “Put Something Good Out There,” really struck a chord.” What better way to help each other in these challenging times.

To be honest, I thought my bench press photos were pretty good, especially for a grandma. They entertained people and possibly made them laugh.

ELBEE That is the worst justification for craziness that I’ve ever heard and she can’t stop sharing the pictures. I’m surprised that none of her bodybuilding photos have resurfaced lately.

ELBEE I spoke too soon.

With that in mind, when I saw a recent photo of Chelsea Handler doing a plank with a dog on her back, I had to give it a try.

GUS I was so embarrassed.

STANLEY And I hate to brag, but I think we know who really does the heavy lifting.

Seriously, I’ve been trying hard to focus on the positive lately, to look for the good that people are putting out there.

In a helpful gesture, someone left these bottles of water and this bag of oranges near a trailhead.

A neighbor, offering encouragement, carefully placed these hand-painted rocks next to the sidewalk.

A man seemed to pull away as I was walking by with Gus and Stanley. Thinking he might be afraid, I asked if he was okay with them. He said “I just stepped back to admire them. I can feel their energy and it’s a blessing.” His kindness made me smile behind my mask,

Although I’ve been very cautious over the past several months, I have tried to give back when I can. If a child or parent calls out to the dogs, I’m happy to put on a sidewalk show from across the street.

ELBEE She is a total ham with an excuse.

A woman walking by with a little boy of about 7 or 8, clinging to her leg, asked me if I could possibly bring them closer. She explained that the child was severely autistic but that petting the dogs would be very helpful.

We were all masked and I carry Purell so I decided to go over. She gently cleaned the boy’s hands and helped him touch the dogs. The interaction was so simple but I could see the gratitude in her eyes.

It’s true. I may bench press Gus and Stanley and hold their leashes, but they really do the heavy lifting. They put something good out there.

Pandemic Fatigue

Like seemingly everyone I’ve spoken to this week, I’m feeling pandemic fatigue. Of course a large part of it is dealing with the unimaginable loss of life. It’s hard to believe that those ever-growing numbers represent loved ones who are gone, leaving empty spaces. It’s difficult to see the toll it’s taking on front line workers.

There is also a more mundane and maybe selfish side to the fatigue. When the rules changed in March, who would have ever believed that in December we’d be living in this surreal world. Things we took for granted like going to the movies or the gym are virtually impossible.

Speaking of virtual, most of my visits with family and friends are on the computer. Social distancing has kept us physically if not emotionally apart. Instead of asking the daughters if they want to come over, I ask “Can you FaceTime later?” What I wouldn’t give to hug them. Gus and Stanley have done so many virtual visits, that when they see my laptop on the floor, they know it’s their time to shine.

Now that I’ve vented, let me see if I can help with a note of positivity.

ELBEE Thank goodness. She was dragging me down a really deep hole.

I was taking Gus and Stanley for one of our regular walks up a residential street that leads into the surrounding mountains. All of a sudden I heard very loud music coming from a black Jeep parked by the side of the road. Then I saw her. A young girl with buzzed hair and a great figure, wearing a sports bra and tights, was dancing by the open driver’s door.

She wasn’t just doing a few steps. She was doing full on hip hop, moving with abandon. She circled around the car and then danced into the middle of the road. It was like a music video with no cameras filming.

In normal times I probably would have been more surprised but during the pandemic, the unusual has become expected. The grandma in me would have been concerned that she was all over the street but instead I was a little jealous.

ELBEE Probably because she looked so fabulous.

There was a part of me that wanted to join in.

GUS & STANLEY That would have been so embarrassing. We’re pretty well known in the neighborhood.

Fortunately, I came to my senses. My last dance class was ballet when I was pregnant with Danielle and it wasn’t pretty.

As I continued to watch her an expression came to mind, “dance like no one is watching.” That’s exactly what she was doing. Focusing on the music and the movement seemed to be giving her such freedom and joy. In these difficult days, don’t we all need something to bring us to that place.